My White Blood Cells Are Attention Whores

I am no stranger to pain.  I have had a broken leg, dental work without being numb, bulging and ruptured discs in my back, childbirth, surgery, and I planked for 21 minutes (on purpose-yay Snohomish Boot Camp).  Nothing, and I mean NOTHING comes close to the level of pain I was in last night.  Apparently my white blood cells weren't happy with all the attention "nausea" and "port" were getting, so they threw a tantrum.

The day started off great.  I felt very "normal" yesterday morning and went to work as usual.  It felt good being out and about after several days of doing not much of anything productive.  I spoke with my oncologist about my port issues and they assured me that what I was feeling was normal and that I just needed more time to heal.  A couple of hours into my day, I started feeling some pain in my hips and upper back.  That was a bummer because I thought I was through the whole Neulasta loveliness.  Um....apparently not so much.

So here I am at work with upper back pain which was worse when I bent at the knees (for some bizarre reason), hip and pelvic pain.  Ewww.  I was a little perplexed by the upper back pain because THAT was not in the brochure, so I called the oncologist again.  I knew to be aware of some symptoms related to the upper back having to do with a port issue, so I figured I should run it past them.  The nurse I spoke with hadn't heard of upper back pain with Neulasta, but checked with the doctor and he was confident it was related.  Their advice: take Tylenol and if it doesn't help, call them back.  By this time is was late afternoon and I just assumed I could deal with the discomfort since I am a rock star and why bother the doctor AGAIN?  I almost preferred the "pain" to nausea because I could at least mentally prepare or "brace" for it.  Plus, like I said, I'm a rock star and pain is just a nuisance and doesn't count.  So whatever.

Well, I'll tell you what!  My white blood cells were having none of this "ignore it" business.  Jeff's mom, stepdad, sister, and her boyfriend came over to celebrate Christmas and make dinner last night, and by the time I got home, I felt like my bones were exploding.  Literally.  Exploding.  I started to think maybe I overdid it working, moved too fast, sitting in the car driving home, anything to blame it on an action as opposed to it just being "what it is".  After eating and trying to hang out for a bit, I went to lay down.  That's when the fun begins.  Oh yes, we're just getting started! 

Have you ever had a toothache?  Or a throbbing cut?  An injury where every time your heart beats your wound throbs in unison?  Imagine that same sensation only the throbbing is in EVERY LARGE BONE IN YOUR BODY!  I kid you not.  It hurt to breathe.  It hurt to move. It hurt to be alive.  I don't just mean it hurt in an "I stubbed my toe poor me" kind of way.  It was AGONY.  Surges of throbbing, shooting pain in my hips, pelvis and back, legs, sternum, shoulders, everything.  I was taking anything and everything I could get my hands on; Tylenol, Benadryl, Lorazepam, Claritin.  I iced everything and cried like a baby.  My poor father-in-law Dr. Doug was trying to give my ideas of what to do, but there just really wasn't anything besides ice, or maybe try taking a bath.  OMG, it was hell.  I do not know how I got through the night other than the fact I took enough sleepy time drugs to put me into enough of a stupor to survive. 

Thankfully, I am MUCH better today.  I have a general "flu-like" achiness which is a piece of cake comparatively.  I hope I'm through the worst of the reaction and will never underestimate the power of white blood cell stimulating drugs again.  Silly me. 

The good news?  I've completely forgotten about my port. 


  1. Ugh!! Feel better Libby!! But, they also said that day 5 was the worst (right) and wouldn't yesterday have been day 5??? Looking for the bright side - that's [huge fingers crossed and major knocking on wood] the worst of it?! And, now that you know that - maybe you can ask for "stronger than tylenol" for the next round? Seriously, I know they don't want you to become dependant but can't they give you T3 or Oxy or at least Vicodin? And/or, can you drink some champagne or wine or shots of Tequila? :)

    I definitely think you need to have a "pain management" discussion with your Dr. BUT, above all, I'm really hoping that today just keeps getting better. Let's chat later!!

    Huge hugs!!

  2. Someday I'll learn to spell-check BEFORE I publish!! DependENT.

    Ugh... I'm SOOOO NOT smart with spelling!!!!


  3. So sorry you have to go through that. Sucks...
    Wish i could say something witty and take your mind off of everything but thats Brendons department! I did watch the Whites the other day and it was so disturbing! Totally up our alley!
    Hang in there, it will pass.

  4. Libby,
    You don't know me, but I'm a friend of Yvonne's. And from what I've been reading, you ARE a rock star, girl! And a talented writer as well. With every word, you kick Big C's butt.
    I'll keep reading as long as you keep writing. And I'll keep thinking about you.