tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1444273167044791232024-03-05T04:01:02.746-05:00Stop the War in My Raq! My Breast Cancer Blog...More than you ever wanted to know about the cancer battle in my raq.Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.comBlogger46125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-42222970002884692462013-01-03T20:20:00.000-05:002013-01-03T20:20:01.276-05:00Happy New Year! Oh and Some Life LessonsIt's been quite a while since I've posted anything. I've been a bit of a slacker the last few months so allow me to cram everything into one post. I actually started to write an update in November, but never got around to finishing it and then the holidays came around and here we are. First let me say Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!!! I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday season and is looking forward to what lies ahead in 2013. I am excited to see what this year holds for me and I have a lot of personal goals I've set that I can't wait to accomplish. I thrive on goal setting, which I feel I've been missing the last couple of months as I've gotten into the same old routine of life. I'm re-focusing for 2013 and can't wait to see what happens. <br />
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October 27th was the one year anniversary of my cancer diagnosis. Hard to believe it's been a year-but at the same time I find myself thinking "it's only been a year?". I really can't remember what it felt like to not have cancer in the back of my mind 24/7. Not that I obsess about it; it's just become a part of my identity I guess. I've certainly gotten on with life and feel amazing.<br />
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My anniversary gift to myself was running a 10k. Yes, I'm serious. Some of my boot camp buddies and I committed to running the Snohomish River 10k which happened to fall on the anniversary of my diagnosis. I couldn't think of a better way to say F-YOU to cancer, can you? Let me be clear, I do not "enjoy" running. What I do enjoy is a challenge. Setting a goal to run a 10k was definitely out of my comfort zone and not something I ever thought I'd CHOOSE to do. I trained and prepared, and with the help of my buddies, managed to complete the whole 6.2 miles without stopping-which was my ultimate goal. I didn't care about the time, just finishing. It really was coming full circle for me. One year ago I wasn't sure if I would be alive (sounds dramatic but true) much less physically capable of pushing my body like that...I am so thankful. I plan to run a half marathon in April, the Ragnar relay race in July, and potentially the Susan G. 3 Day again in September. Who is this person????<br />
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Leading up to the anniversary, I couldn't help but think about where I was and what I was doing a year before. I had no idea what the next few months were going to be like. That my world would be rocked and flipped and would never be the same. I remember the terror and helplessness, but I also remember the outpouring of love and support from everyone around me. <br />
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Here are a few of the things I learned during the past year. <br />
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1. There are some really great people in this world. Seriously. People that would drop everything to help me or my family, even people I hardly knew. I was stopped on the street on more than one occasion by people who just wanted to say some encouraging words. I wasn't embarrassed at all, but grateful. I absorbed every ounce of hope I could get. <br />
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2. Oncology is the least appreciated specialty in medicine. Nobody wants to talk about Oncology, but chances are at some point in our lives we'll all have to deal with cancer-for ourselves or a loved one. I was constantly amazed at how kind and compassionate the majority of the doctors, nurses, lab techs, and support staff are to patients. They have always been willing to answer questions-no matter how silly. They ooze hope and optimism, which is critical when you are facing a deadly disease. We are so lucky to have access to such amazing health care professionals in this area. <br />
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3. Get over yourself and love the people around you, even when you don't feel like it. This is a biggy. It is SO easy to get complacent with life. There's constant pressure to be this person, or have that. Perfect marriage, perfect parent, perfect house. It's all a bunch of crap. When the s*** hits the fan, nothing matters but the people you love, and the people that love you. All of the unnecessary stuff falls away and your focus becomes waking up one more day to see your child, or husband, or dear friend. To be alive and see the snow, or the Christmas lights, to cuddle with my cat. Very simple. <br />
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4. Take care of your body. Yeah, who doesn't need a reminder? Watch what you eat. Exercise people!!!! Don't smoke, drink in moderation, get some sleep. Don't let stress and pressure rule your life. IT. IS. NOT. WORTH IT. I am certainly not perfect-not even close. But I have definitely learned how important it is to take care of yourself. If I had not been in such great physical condition prior to being diagnosed, my experience may have turned out quite differently and I may not have bounced back as quickly. Change just one bad habit-just one. You won't regret it. <br />
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5. <strong><em>YES YOU CAN</em></strong>. How many times do you catch yourself saying <em><strong>"I can't do THAT".</strong></em> Ummm...yes you can. <strong><em>"I can't lose weight".</em></strong> Yep. You can. <strong><em> "I can't live through cancer!".</em></strong> Be quiet, yes you can. <strong><em>"I can't walk 60 miles in 3 days".</em></strong> Whatever. <strong><em>"I can't run 6.2 miles-are you on</em></strong> <strong><em>crack?!"</em></strong> Oh reeeealllly? You know what's coming-yes you can. Guess what? There are very few things in life that are impossible. Going through this experience really taught me that. It might be uncomfortable or hard, but "can't" is rarely a <strong><em>given</em></strong>, it's a <strong><em>choice</em></strong>. Don't sell yourself short. There is no greater feeling of accomplishment than doing something you thought was impossible. <br />
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I've mentioned this before, but it my favorite quote in the whole world. I often say it to myself when I'm having a bad day, or when I'm running and miserable and want to stop. It was especially important last year when I was in the midst of the crisis and I needed some inspiration.<br />
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<em><strong>“You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience by which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, 'I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along. You must do the thing you think you cannot do. " </strong></em><br />
<em><strong></strong></em><br />
<em><strong>Eleanor Roosevelt</strong></em> <br />
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My favorite part is the last sentence-<em> "You must do the thing you think you cannot do."</em> I had a t-shirt made with that on it that I wore during the race with "Survivor-One Year" on the back. I'm proud to have walked through this and made it out the other side with optimism and a sense of purpose. I'm grateful for that aspect of it.<br />
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I had my second post-treatment mammogram in November and all was well. I will continue to have them six months apart until I'm two years post-treatment then will go down to once a year. I met with my oncologist recently and other than being a little low in calcium, all of my blood work was great. We had a frank discussion about recurrence and the future. He told me the first two years are the most crucial-as that's when they see the most cases of recurrence in the same area or the other breast. We talked about what a toll going through this takes on people physically and emotionally, and he made it a point to tell me to be patient. I must admit that I've really been "lazy" the past month in terms of eating right and exercise. I started missing more and more boot camp, got sick and slacked on my running routine, and took full advantage of the holidays and ate TERRIBLE!!! Like most people, it's easy to fall back into old bad habits, but I don't have the luxury of denial anymore. I know it's imperitive to be healthy. I don't want cancer again...EVER!<br />
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Sadly, breast cancer continues to touch my life. I found out recently that my best friend from grade school was diagnosed. We've communicated some and there is so much I wish I could say but can't find the words. I wish it weren't happening to her-I wish it didn't happen to anyone. I want to fight her battle for her, but also know she will learn so much through this and is strong and will be okay. It still sucks. I hope anyone going through this or who knows someone going through this knows that there is HOPE. That surviving is the goal, but don't stop there. LEARN from it and pass it on. Don't be embarrassed by or selfish with your story. I was inspired by every person that went through it before me. I knew if they could do it, so could I. I knew that if there were children in the world battling cancer, who the hell was I to think I couldn't handle it. Puts things in perspective. <br />
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So, that's the 411 for now! Thanks for taking the time to read my story. I truly do appreciate each and every person in my life...I am so lucky! <br />
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LIFE IS GOOD!Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-46677727334968711822012-09-23T11:50:00.001-04:002012-09-23T11:52:54.465-04:00Suck it Cancer-I just walked all over your a**!<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBNKDtLD-vGS2YHl3CxzxQ6AIn99Od6GPJ87qhum5ODcwB_x5-6XtUQkM86daGaptYyMEsXqOwM1i_QWFL7WEqwNsxhIvTfv90m6_JpkqNheRf_Mc8oLHG1-N3_dObOt_8kI42rdBIGz_C/s1600/three+day+sign.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="148" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBNKDtLD-vGS2YHl3CxzxQ6AIn99Od6GPJ87qhum5ODcwB_x5-6XtUQkM86daGaptYyMEsXqOwM1i_QWFL7WEqwNsxhIvTfv90m6_JpkqNheRf_Mc8oLHG1-N3_dObOt_8kI42rdBIGz_C/s200/three+day+sign.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Opening Day<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I did it!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I walked 60
(Komen) miles…which translates closer to 66 <strong>ACTUAL</strong> miles, in three days.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hello blisters and shin splints, allow me to
introduce myself!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Crossing I-90 Day One</td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I really could go on and on about the logistics of it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How we walked from Seattle to Marymoor
Park.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Through Redmond, Kirkland, and
back through Redmond again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>From the UW
through Fremont, Ballard, Magnolia, and finished in downtown Seattle.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think the more important thing for me to
share would be what I found so <strong><em>SPECIAL</em></strong> about the Susan G. Komen 3 Day. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkMM9WaHWXk1bS7RbQJ159Za_r_q9c12exPe9pX_KJHm3OYgpn5iVBlbe37HgAuImXPBYX9TijDW_Uyq8VegsNxTldxlMrtmrdPEcGuDkcQeAlUSlHL06dHF5u-Xu2W8iolAYZHBBaBCDH/s1600/029.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkMM9WaHWXk1bS7RbQJ159Za_r_q9c12exPe9pX_KJHm3OYgpn5iVBlbe37HgAuImXPBYX9TijDW_Uyq8VegsNxTldxlMrtmrdPEcGuDkcQeAlUSlHL06dHF5u-Xu2W8iolAYZHBBaBCDH/s200/029.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Tracy and I on the Kirkland Waterfront Day 2</td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">First of all I’d like to thank my partner Tracy for being
craze enough to volunteer to do this thing with me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t think either of us had<strong><em> ANY</em></strong> <strong><em>CLUE</em></strong> what
kind of physical toll this would take on our bodies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We had some great moments and made some great
friends at the medical tent (Tracy’s new BFF Holly was the best!).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thank you so much for making me laugh!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-WT33b4jiPUxPKXjOKdGnB3zH5zyxxWTNxhlYVFWQUvwQyqNGjM8fA9aYY9ssMI2Zlx1GeVD-61UVyZTrJJoPvIdrOWqyoS2-_Fr7LnaLqOCD6v78O7HoH9NyXibE4vkFvQWz6A0_71yc/s1600/018.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-WT33b4jiPUxPKXjOKdGnB3zH5zyxxWTNxhlYVFWQUvwQyqNGjM8fA9aYY9ssMI2Zlx1GeVD-61UVyZTrJJoPvIdrOWqyoS2-_Fr7LnaLqOCD6v78O7HoH9NyXibE4vkFvQWz6A0_71yc/s200/018.JPG" width="150" /></a></td></tr>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjawbgRRp8-FlW0mJxQr8moj-rSczaeH5EQHsbw2pgmVRaZWERpnuligs7ENRg1oyooRm7JW82zqGeYN-MUU_REMcKjEdfzaSZtKD6W4XP89H3PwsOc-2aEVaw1-emsM96aN1MuuMynBNTc/s1600/bear+guy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjawbgRRp8-FlW0mJxQr8moj-rSczaeH5EQHsbw2pgmVRaZWERpnuligs7ENRg1oyooRm7JW82zqGeYN-MUU_REMcKjEdfzaSZtKD6W4XP89H3PwsOc-2aEVaw1-emsM96aN1MuuMynBNTc/s1600/bear+guy.jpg" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgO_t_PJQgS9akSBeXJohYM3AZmi7hZ-4dIlI1HhRcUTUcSa7693JKjcQHmoRVHt8IFPG06WXsXgkWNUZa4yBLgJba3zHp3ClGaQIYNC8Eo4O3YY55UOU_f-AZeKzjWc_aQwpsrFUjfJQxf/s1600/wig+guy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgO_t_PJQgS9akSBeXJohYM3AZmi7hZ-4dIlI1HhRcUTUcSa7693JKjcQHmoRVHt8IFPG06WXsXgkWNUZa4yBLgJba3zHp3ClGaQIYNC8Eo4O3YY55UOU_f-AZeKzjWc_aQwpsrFUjfJQxf/s1600/wig+guy.jpg" /></a><span style="font-family: Calibri;">The people that organize this event are incredible.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The sheer number of volunteers it takes to
make something of this magnitude run smoothly was astounding.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Every single volunteer I encountered along
the route or at camp was kind, encouraging, and helpful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All along the route we had these guys (and a
couple of gals) that stood at certain streets to make sure we crossed
safely.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>These guys (and gals) were all
dolled up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Pink from head to toe, the
men wearing bras (stuffed with balloons and in one case bears), wigs, nothing
was off limits for these people.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was
so fun to see them all along the route encouraging us to keep moving.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Believe me-sometimes seeing those faces was
the motivation I needed to keep going.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>There was this elderly couple that showed up all along the route with
these huge homemade signs on canvas.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
think they had a different one at each location.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They were so cute!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There was also this one man who would park his
truck and blast his country music and cheer us on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He was great!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Apparently his wife walks every year but couldn’t do it this year for
some reason, but he still went out and cheered us on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>These folks were with us the entire
weekend!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was unbelievably selfless. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Let’s talk about the Seattle Bicycle cops.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They were <strong><em>THE BEST!</em></strong><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They were all dressed up; complete with pink
bicycle tires and handcuffs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They
started with us in Seattle on day one and rode the entire three day route;
making sure we were safe, cheering us on, and making us laugh.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The boring Bellevue and Redmond police
couldn’t be bothered to “get pink”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m
seriously considering writing a letter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>We gave those poor cops a hard time though, and I'm sure they felt pretty bad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Anyway, the Seattle cops were wonderful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was so great at the finish line too
because they were all lined up as we came down the home stretch, it was so
sweet. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What was really touching were the many, many, people who came
out of their homes or set up tables with snacks and water all along the
way.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Like I said before, when you’ve
walked 18 miles and you’re exhausted and sore, seeing these people smiling and
cheering for you was so inspirational.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>At the end of day two when my shin splints were starting to really kill
me, it meant the world to have that support.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My dear friend Becky met up with me in Juanita to cheer me on, as did my
friend Christine as I passed her condo in Kirkland.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My buddy Don tracked me down in Kirkland and
walked with me for three miles.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was
so sweet!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That was towards the end of a
VERY long 13 mile stretch for me and I was hurting big time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He totally kept my mind off of the pain and I
was able to keep going.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At the end of
day two my mom and aunt met me at camp and I was able to relax and visit with
them for a while.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Again, the support was
unbelievable.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even my friend Kimberly’s
husband Dan set up our tent for us on the first day so we wouldn’t have to
worry about it when we got to camp.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Things like that meant so much!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Of course I told my husband to stay away because they tell you not to
bring family and friends in, but later we saw husband’s bringing their wives
coffee and meals.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now I know for next
time!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8eqR9WIE63fmwg_fppDI8IYdTp2yPFCbW2v_9NKeTqSpxgiXeRWHn98m3XLOR3di0MO0fJITSXJRMT_uQVJv6sP9XqyWhFff6_-K1LF216do6MvzDlQFeU3XpL-YxHSreItVQQMfXB-QO/s1600/blister+whisperer.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8eqR9WIE63fmwg_fppDI8IYdTp2yPFCbW2v_9NKeTqSpxgiXeRWHn98m3XLOR3di0MO0fJITSXJRMT_uQVJv6sP9XqyWhFff6_-K1LF216do6MvzDlQFeU3XpL-YxHSreItVQQMfXB-QO/s1600/blister+whisperer.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Day 3</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I’d like to give a major shout out to the medical
staff.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This team of doctors, nurses,
physical therapists, etc. did an incredible job of taking care of us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m sure none of them want to look at another
blister in their lives!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I personally had
them lanced multiple times and they have it down to a science.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At one point they were threatening to bus
everyone who hadn’t been treated yet (the line was very long) to lunch.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Excuse me, you aren’t bussing me anywhere.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But they turned it up a notch and breezed
through a line of several people and we all got out on the route in the nick of
time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The medical staff was all
volunteer, and although they did have their share of people passing out and
others with more emergent symptoms, the majority of their time was spent on
blister care.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>God bless ‘em!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgE77VgK4lW4HaoCJfhMdiOcnFwBOlCZCKL6MknVntpk66jTZIgT9aNK7B5zOsme8XpjS5XDHzaC3Fg51SRLky0Isl6SPsIiUq_RRtKu_JWPuUR1YBA6cKzUD9_uBPv4wiGt3UYYQiKMhKn/s1600/balloon+arch+magnolia.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgE77VgK4lW4HaoCJfhMdiOcnFwBOlCZCKL6MknVntpk66jTZIgT9aNK7B5zOsme8XpjS5XDHzaC3Fg51SRLky0Isl6SPsIiUq_RRtKu_JWPuUR1YBA6cKzUD9_uBPv4wiGt3UYYQiKMhKn/s1600/balloon+arch+magnolia.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Supporters in Magnolia</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Day three was the best day (and the worst) for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I could not take a single step without pain
from my shin splints, and as the day wore on both of my pinky toes were
complete blisters.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The blisters were
tolerable enough, but there were a few times that the shin splints almost did
me in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>By the time I got to our first
pit stop which was about 6.5 miles in, I was pretty miserable.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The medical staff taped my left leg up and it
made just enough of a difference that I was able to keep going.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am so glad I did!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We walked from Ballard through Discovery
Park, and down through Magnolia.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t
think I’ve ever been to Magnolia and it was beautiful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The people in the neighborhood were great,
some blasting their music for us since we weren’t allowed to wear
headphones.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And as always, a slew of
supporters clapping and cheering us as we passed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That part of the route was beautiful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The views were amazing, the weather was
beautiful, and we were almost done!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQ_fua9IN4-RuJ-mG5Y46N5vwsnH3pQu7BMvmh_2o15bAIam-s4TH8XxtCMaNskcwEh4KwbwrdnMGeby3TAafJ3ETQoPWYdBoAi54BdOuTPZHYLCSnGtsGELKjoqhq2hXIiWfPJJCAX83c/s1600/libby+and+kimberly.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQ_fua9IN4-RuJ-mG5Y46N5vwsnH3pQu7BMvmh_2o15bAIam-s4TH8XxtCMaNskcwEh4KwbwrdnMGeby3TAafJ3ETQoPWYdBoAi54BdOuTPZHYLCSnGtsGELKjoqhq2hXIiWfPJJCAX83c/s1600/libby+and+kimberly.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Kimberly and I</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The last four miles of day three were a breeze!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had my blisters lanced at lunch and the
ibuprofen was kicking in and dulled the pain of the shin splints.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We could see the space needle and knew we
were so close to being done.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
practically ran that last part!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Luckily
I was able to hook up with my friend Kimberly ( a fellow boot camper and
survivor) and her group <strong>“Kimberly’s Breast Friends”</strong> for a celebratory Margarita
on the water down by the new Ferris Wheel. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We all walked the remaining couple of miles
and crossed the finish line together.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Waiting for me were my amazing husband Jeff, my beautiful daughter
Mandi, and her sweet boyfriend Logan.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Wow, we did it. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvpkkNc67I9PIq9RI36TCrsCH2vKa9RzzD-j0v1ZzdSvAJze6Hzpo1AtNbtN54Wd1aej_tKGIRKUEHK1OtQK8EC82SNd-lbWoJsGTXfU2eMEBDHakqEkziNG9CP9Ibxqg2IPc-xkja_vgm/s1600/tracy+and+libby+finish.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvpkkNc67I9PIq9RI36TCrsCH2vKa9RzzD-j0v1ZzdSvAJze6Hzpo1AtNbtN54Wd1aej_tKGIRKUEHK1OtQK8EC82SNd-lbWoJsGTXfU2eMEBDHakqEkziNG9CP9Ibxqg2IPc-xkja_vgm/s1600/tracy+and+libby+finish.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">We're Done!<br />
</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The closing ceremony was by far the most emotional moment
for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They had all of the survivors
come in last as a group.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The other
walkers were all in a circle and we walked into the center of it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The speaker talked about how we didn’t just
give up after being diagnosed with cancer and going through treatment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We all made a decision to be part of finding
the cure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That did me in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Less than a year ago I was diagnosed with
cancer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I endured surgery, chemotherapy,
and radiation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had no idea if I would
be alive or what my life would be like.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And here I was.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Standing in a
group of survivors and we just walked 60 miles in three days and we were happy
about it!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Screw you cancer!!!!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">My goal going into this was to walk every single inch of
that course.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s just me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was very determined to finish the entire
thing-even if it meant dragging my broken leg behind me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was determined to do it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And I did; every inch of every mile.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was the most physically challenging thing
I have ever done…and I loved every minute of it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe not EVERY minute, but you know what I
mean.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Would I do it again knowing what I
know now?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><strong>ABSOLUTELY WITHOUT A
DOUBT!</strong><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDqIS8QAObCiR7-K8IxXKbJvhsnK_XxQleXP9THGmidc3NdY5T9Lp_XuPT_Nt7ojppyp2-t52tJgoU0Aau213QiIQSNBqBWR3zcklLGdtXBajSwV37wzSkzo9CdWVz9mpXD2Y4CfMGbm9W/s1600/pink+tents.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDqIS8QAObCiR7-K8IxXKbJvhsnK_XxQleXP9THGmidc3NdY5T9Lp_XuPT_Nt7ojppyp2-t52tJgoU0Aau213QiIQSNBqBWR3zcklLGdtXBajSwV37wzSkzo9CdWVz9mpXD2Y4CfMGbm9W/s200/pink+tents.jpg" width="148" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><strong>If you ever have the chance to walk in the three day, do it. If you don't, go out and cheer the walkers on.</strong></span> </div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I would not have been able to do any of it without the
emotional support of my friends and family, but also the financial support from
my wonderful and generous sponsors.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> I was able to raise $3,180 but you also</span>
gave me the opportunity to create an incredible memory, an experience I will
never forget.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will forever be grateful
for your gift.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><strong>Diane Johnson</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Michelle Paige</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Fred and Kesti Miller</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Debbie George</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><strong>Dr. Kristina Adams Waldorf</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Debbie Mickschl</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>April Van Assche</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Lyndal Balliet</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>The Queen of Kong</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Scott Hagen</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Debbi Grieser</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Linda Strand</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Vickie Ravenscroft</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Christine Reatz</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Bill and Kathy-the best neighbor's ever!</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Laura Main</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Rebecca Hettich</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Lisa Howard</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Peg Ogle</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Arlene Escobar</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Pat Gilosa-DeAngelis</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Gayle Robinson</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Sylvia Randal</strong></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial;"><strong>Neil Roche</strong></span></li>
</ul>
<strong><span style="font-family: Arial;"></span></strong><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><strong><em>Seriously, thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!</em></strong></span><br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Oh...check out my new tattoo! Yes, I love cats. Isn't that clever...the tail turns into the breast cancer awareness ribbon?!</span> <br />
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfMskwQm4Am8EuKCUN6g6LAPdke3MAnaQMILLagAWQYraGvF0umiIniZI0umDeS1YpJvHE3RTqZpLz2XxdOsJeMLap7TC9nJjO_2-QpwSLOzU9wNQUMJ7ujKId7Daa7el8F_VNOBf0uucp/s1600/photo.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfMskwQm4Am8EuKCUN6g6LAPdke3MAnaQMILLagAWQYraGvF0umiIniZI0umDeS1YpJvHE3RTqZpLz2XxdOsJeMLap7TC9nJjO_2-QpwSLOzU9wNQUMJ7ujKId7Daa7el8F_VNOBf0uucp/s200/photo.JPG" width="149" /></a></div>
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<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></div>
Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-92069095508728529352012-06-16T16:20:00.001-04:002012-06-16T16:20:51.999-04:00Moving On!Well, it's been a busy couple of months for me and I'm happy to report that things are AWESOME!!!!<br />
<br />
I finished radiation on May 11th and was able to get through all 35 treatments with very little damage. By the end I had a couple of areas that were peeling and sore, but all in all I tolerated it really well. I was RELIGIOUS about applying lotion twice a day, and found this Vitamin E and Wheat Germ stuff at Fred Meyer (in the organic section) that was wonderful. Anyhoo, I just loved my radiation oncologist, Dr. Adam, so it was a little sad to say good bye to him. Not so sad that I plan on going back any time soon, but he ranks right up there as my number 2 fav for docs. Number 1 is of course Dr. Kent (see previous posts for an explanation). <br />
<br />
The biggest hurdle for me lately was getting through my first post-treatment mammogram without having a heart attack. I didn't think it would be that big of a deal until a few days before when the anxiety set in. I have never had a good mammogram experience (ok, I only had one previously and they found CANCER), so needless to say my body went into fight or flight mode at the mere thought of going back to that place. Don't get me wrong, they are all soooo nice there and in my mind I knew that I should be the least worried about this particular mammogram (it being so soon after treatment and all). It's so easy to tell yourself not to worry but it's an entirely different thing to actually believe what you're saying. I wasn't quite there yet. I was a wreck the few days before-couldn't help it. I know it will get easier as time goes on, but this first one was difficult. <br />
<br />
Of course when I got to my appointment I told the tech that I was very nervous and she needed to tell me if she saw anything right away. I know she can't legally do that, but whatever. I still tried to convince her that I was special and deserved different treatment than anyone else. She didn't buy it. She was actually a nine year breast cancer survivor herself and was very sweet about the whole thing. Still didn't give me a CLUE! I left not knowing a thing. Although that in itself was different than my first experience, when it was pretty obvious they had concerns and I knew it immediately. Anyway, they told me it could take up to five days to get the results so I left and waited. And waited. And waited. Are you kidding me? Cancer patient here...a little compassion please! Well, about a week later Jeff called me at work when he got home and said "you got a letter from Group Health. Your mammogram was normal!". Ok first-HALLELUJAH! And second, WTH? A letter? How DARE they treat me like any NORMAL patient. Who cares, right? It was PERFECT news. So I'm good to go for another six months, yay!<br />
<br />
About a week after my last radiation treatment I started a drug called Tamoxifen, which I'll take for the next five years. Tamoxifen is a hormone blocking drug that blocks hormone production so my cancer doesn't have any food to grow. Since my cancer is fed by estrogen and progesterone, the idea is that even if there are some cancer cells that weren't killed off by the chemo and raiation, they'll remain dormant as long as there are no hormones to feed them. Starve those little puppies! Once again I am so fortunate because I have had none of the typical side affects associated with this drug. The most common symptoms are hot flashes (not a one), weight gain (I've actually lost weight since I started), and bone pain (again...nada). I was on them for about a month before I had a follow up appointment with my oncologist, and I asked him when I should expect to start having the side affects. He said that I should have already had them...so most likely I won't get them at all. Can I get an amen?! AMEN!!! <br />
<br />
I had my port removed, which was great. I actually stayed awake for it this time, which was a little bit freaky. Of course tissue had sort of globbed onto the thing and she had to do all this tugging to get it out and I was totally aware of the whole thing. It was great though because I didn't have to stick around afterward, just got dressed and left. Now I have to decide exactly what I want the tattoo to look like that I'll be having done around the scar. <br />
<br />
I've been back to boot camp for the past couple of months and feel pretty close to normal there. My endurance still isn't quite what it was, but it gets better every week. The weight I gained during chemo is coming off slowly and steadily, which is fine by me. I feel really good and can't wait for the 3 day walk in September. I haven't been walking as much as I should to train, but I'll buckle down the next couple of months and it'll be fine. <br />
<br />
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Some of my boot camp buddies walked in the Seattle Susan G. Komen 5k on June 3rd. It was great! I've done the walk several times before but never as a survivor. It's very humbling to look around and see all of the women fighting or who have fought the disease, and to be reminded of the ones who didn't make it. There were a lot of young women, younger than me, and that is always shocking and sad. It's such a unique experience looking at people and knowing they've been through the same traumatic experience and made it. I find myself wondering how it was for them? How long before they stopped crying every two seconds? How long before they believed they'd be okay? Do they still have the wind knocked out of them at the thought of the diagnosis? Do they get worried when they have their mammograms? When does it get easier? I don't dwell on those thoughts but when you're surrounded by people going through the same thing, that's what went through my head. Above all the day was inspirational! There were so many people there walking, running, or just supporting the cause. The weather was great and I was so blessed to have my friends do it with me. Thank you Tabitha, Peri-Lyn, and Andy! It meant so much to me!<br />
<br />
As you can see in the picture, my hair is growing back. I've had to wax my eyebrows and shave my legs, the ONE benefit of going through chemo that didn't last. I've stopped wearing hats for the most part, which still feels a little strange but I was so tired of hats! Jeff says I almost look like I cut my hair like this on purpose. Yeah, I don't care, I'll take whatever I can get at this point. Jeff is obsessed with it and wants to "trim" it up but I've threatened him with death if he touches it. Seriously, my husband is the best. He has been the most supportive guy in the world. On my last day of radiation he surprised me with roses in the morning and after my treatment he had our family surprise me at the restaurant when we went out for breakfast. It was so thoughtful of him and my family (Karli you count) for being so supportive. <br />
<br />
So my life for the time being is blissfully normal. I do boot camp, work, watch my husband coach softball, spend time with my girl when she isn't working or in school (or shopping), and just hang out. How awesome is that? I see my oncologist every three months and then have mammograms every six months, and that's about it. I'll be turning 40 on July 4th and I am THRILLED to have another birthday, especially one where I'm happy, healthy, and CANCER FREE! <br />
<br />Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-46535834250081062392012-05-06T16:02:00.000-04:002012-05-06T16:02:07.718-04:00Ok...Now What?Let's recap shall we? <br />
<br />
October 27th, 2011, I was diagnosed with Invasive Lobular Carcinoma, stage II. I had a lumpectomy on November 21st, started chemo on December 22nd, finished chemo on February 28th, started radiation on March 26th, and this Friday May 11th will be my last day of radiation and the end of my more aggressive treatments. Shortly I'll be starting a hormone blocking drug called Tamoxifen, which I'll take every day for the next five years. Puh-lease, piece of cake! <br />
<br />
Radiation has gone fairly well for me. My skin held up quite nicely until the last couple of weeks when I developed some sore spots. I've been very religious about applying the lotions they recommend and now wear these gauzy sort of bandages that keep the skin from rubbing off. I know, sounds lovely. Other than this relatively minor side effect and some fatigue, it's been pretty easy. The biggest nuisance is just the time involved. Five days a week for seven weeks started off a bit daunting, but they have things down to such a science that there were days I would leave my car and get back in 12 minutes later. It's been so convenient going to the Providence Regional Cancer Partnership in Everett because it's only about ten minutes from my house and I don't have to pay for parking! The doctor's have been so wonderful and the radiation therapists are all so sweet. Don't get me wrong, I won't miss any of those people. Have a nice life y'all..peace out!!!<br />
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So, this leads me to the next question. What the hell happens now?<br />
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I haven't really been responding much to phone calls and e-mails lately because I feel a bit out of sorts. When you get a diagnosis like this, you're immediately forced into making major life changing decisions and are consumed by the gobs of information. I also felt such an urgency to connect with people in my life and to cherish every moment. Pretty soon you get into a rhythm. To put it simply, you feel like you are DOING something about it. So much focus is on getting through chemo and just trying to function and feel OK, it keeps your mind occupied. When I finished chemo and had my month off before radiation, I thought my life would go back to normal...yay! Well that's SORT OF what happens, but how could things ever be "normal"? Normal looks very different now and that's kind of a bummer. <br />
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I've tried getting back into a routine. Boot camp in the mornings has been harder than I thought it would be, and I'm a big baby about it. I guess I expected to be planking for 20 minutes after my four month hiatus. Um, yeah, NOT happening. I'm up about 15 pounds which Dr. Jiang wants me to lose ASAP. My Radiation Oncologist said not to lose weight so I was very confused (which is another story but don't get me started). I think despite all of these things, my bigger issue is the feeling of powerlessness. I have no control over anything(not that I ever did) but it felt like I did. All the body aches, hair loss, fatigue, etc. were a sign that my body was fighting the disease. Those side effects are gone-even my hair is growing back (which is good), but I want to feel like I'm still fighting. <br />
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I had a long conversation with my Radiation Oncologist Dr. Adam about this, and he had some great words of wisdom. First he told me that it could be many months before my body is normal again and not to expect too much. He also told me that there are two things I can do that have absolutely been proven to increase chances of long term survival; exercise and weight control. Okay, that's something I can handle, but do I just move on with my life like nothing ever happened? How will I feel in six months when it's time for my first mammogram? How will I handle the fear? I'm afraid to be afraid...ha! <br />
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Last week I was having a particularly emotional day, voicing my frustration with my body and my fears about the future. Jeff listened and summed things up rather nicely. I'm paraphrasing here but the gist of what he said was this: Cancer has been a chapter in the book of my life. I can't go back to old chapters and relive them, and I can't skip ahead and write the new chapters. I have to address each chapter as it comes and find peace in that. Very true Jeffrey, very true. <br />
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I hope this doesn't sound like whining at all because I am SO grateful to be where I am. I know I'm lucky to be alive and to have made it through this in good condition and with a very good prognosis for survival. <br />
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I guess Friday I'll be turning another page in the book and moving on to the next chapter. Better be a good one!!!!<br />
<br />Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-91571827984147760802012-04-07T10:18:00.002-04:002012-04-07T10:55:58.941-04:00Sorry-I'm a Total Slacker!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div>I know...it's been forever since I posted anything! Well, no news is good news in my little world. <br />
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I've basically been getting on with my life. I started back at boot camp on March 15th, ran in the St. Patrick's Day dash on March 17th, then promptly got deathly ill with a horrible cough and missed boot camp for a whole week because I was hacking up a lung. Maybe I pushed it a little jumping back into things when my immune system was still not where it should be. <br />
<div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">The biggest news is that I started radiation on March 26th, which is a fascinating process (if you ask me). First of all, it's very easy. Before you actually get your treatments, you go in and they do this "mapping" of the area and give you teeny tiny tattoos which helps them to align the lasers for your treatment. I have a total of four; one under each arm, one in the center of my chest, and one on my cancerous boob. They created a mold of my head and arms (positioned over my head) and each session you basically lay into the mold and it helps you to know how to position your body. Once you're laying down, the radiation therapists pull your body a millimeter here and there until the lasers line up exactly with the tattoos. They strap you in and away we go! The radiation machine itself is crazy-like something out of a science fiction movie. Here's a picture of what it looks like. </div><br />
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<a href="http://images.search.yahoo.com/images/view;_ylt=A2KJkK0GTIBP8RQA_J6JzbkF;_ylu=X3oDMTBlMTQ4cGxyBHNlYwNzcgRzbGsDaW1n?back=http%3A%2F%2Fimages.search.yahoo.com%2Fsearch%2Fimages%3Fp%3Dradiation%2Btherapy%2Bmachine%26_adv_prop%3Dimage%26va%3Dradiation%2Btherapy%2Bmachine%26vm%3Dr%26fr%3Dyfp-t-521%26tab%3Dorganic%26ri%3D31&w=2048&h=1536&imgurl=www.ammed.com%2Fen%2Fuploads%2Fimages%2Fequipment%2FLinex2.jpg&rurl=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ammed.com%2Fen%2Findex.php%3Fpage%3Dradiation-therapy&size=285.7+KB&name=Radiation+Therapy&p=radiation+therapy+machine&oid=a8ad80e9848397f4fd31ad7c254ed1ca&fr2=&fr=yfp-t-521&tt=Radiation%2BTherapy&b=31&ni=96&no=31&tab=organic&ts=&vm=r&sigr=11os9bp08&sigb=14pf9ggab&sigi=11ko62991&.crumb=j3jP7.fW3K." id="yui_3_3_0_14_13338081166711193" title="Radiation Therapy"><img alt="" height="168" id="yui_3_3_0_14_13338081166711192" src="http://ts4.mm.bing.net/images/thumbnail.aspx?q=5060412579184903&id=b1061b688622511f5fd89a14af20c27e" style="height: 168px; margin-left: -41px; width: 224px;" title="Radiation Therapy" width="224" /></a><br />
The actual treatment only takes a couple of minutes. For me, they're doing three different areas and the machine spins around you and makes these crazy noises. You don't actually see or feel anything happening at the time. Once it's done you hop down, get dressed, and you're done. From the time I park my car until I get back in to leave, it's about 15 minutes. Some days they have to do additional x-rays and it takes a little longer, but compared to chemo, it's NOTHING!!! I have to meet with the radiation oncologist every Wednesday so they can check the skin and how I'm feeling. So far I've had some minor side affects (sensitivity) and yesterday I noticed my skin is turning red. I've completed 10 of my 35 treatments so almost a third of the way done...woo hoo!!!! <br />
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My hair is coming in...SLOWLY. I look like I have baby hair right now but with a bunch of strands that sort of stick straight up. It is NOT attractive. I am sick and tired of looking at my ugly bald head. I just hope I have enough hair by summer that I feel okay going without a hat. <br />
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I'm so ready to get on with my life. I already feel like I'm moving from being a cancer patient back to a normal person. Not everything centers around treatment or how I'm feeling, and I think about the future without being paralyzed by fear (most of the time). The flip side is that you start to lose a little of the perspective that a diagnosis gives you. It's easy to get caught back up into the monotony of daily life-which is good-but easy to forget that it all means nothing when you're faced with your own mortality. It's good to remind myself of the journey and to remember what's really important because I really have come to appreciate life as well as my family and friends. Five months ago I never would have thought I'd feel "normal" again...but life really does goes on! <br />
<br />
Well, that's the latest. I PROMISE to do a better job of updating!<br />
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Bye bye now!Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-19209791859947592052012-03-12T16:44:00.000-05:002012-03-12T16:44:58.215-05:00Being Sick Sucks!I don't mean the "cancer" kind of sick, although that DOES suck. I'm talking about the lingering cough sick I've got going on right now. I have not been able to sleep for the past few nights, and I AM CRANKY!<br />
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I was supposed to start boot camp this week and get back to my routine, but it's looking like that's going to have to wait at least a few more days. I have zero patience with all of this right now. I feel fat (I've gained at least 15 pounds), ugly (I have no hair), and still just don't feel like myself. I know, I know, give myself a break and yes it could be a lot worse. I know I'll get over it and do feel like a few nice days around here would definitely help. <br />
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On a good note...I continue to be amazed by the support I've gotten for the 3 Day! I've gone above and beyond the amount of donations I ever thought I would get. I've been in the process of tracking down addresses to send "thank you" notes to you all, so don't think I'm an ungrateful slacker with no manners. I had the great idea of sending out hand made cards and did a batch, but they weren't that great, so most of you are getting some store bought-but lovely ones nonetheless.<br />
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Anyhoo...that's my rant for the dayLibby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-42576615339053249162012-03-07T15:04:00.000-05:002012-03-07T15:04:18.135-05:00Taking the Next Step (and other AWESOME things)<img border="0" src="http://www.cancerpartnership.org/Site/Content/Images/physicians/adam.gif" /><br />
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So, I met with my Radiation Oncologist yesterday. His name is Dr. Adam and he is...all that and a bag of chips! LOVED him! The totally cool thing about him is the fact that he knows my favorite doctor of all time, Dr. Kent, and worked with him for many years. I told him my expectations were VERY high and to please not be offended if he wasn't able to unseat Dr. Kent as my fav. He had a great sense of humor and took all of my nervous wiseass remarks in stride. <br />
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I was there for about 2 1/2 hours and he explained every detail of what radiation treatment entails. We talked about my diagnosis and prognosis, and he was very good about re-iterating the fact that going through cancer treatment can really take a toll on the body and not to push too hard too fast. I think I need to be reminded of that fact more often than not because I have gotten my butt kicked this past week. <br />
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Anyway, so I'll be having a total of 35 radiation treatments-Monday through Friday for seven weeks. They gave me my very own "connect the dot" tattoos yesterday so they know where the radiation will go EVERY time. I asked if they could do something a little more clever like a heart instead of a plain old dot, but no can do. They really should give people the option. Maybe a choice between a heart, a star, a butterfly, something fluffy and cute. Basically the radiation is an in and out thing-just a few minutes for the actual radiation each time-and shouldn't have too many side affects. They say you can get what equates to a sunburn as the treatments go on, and some people experience added fatigue. Every person I've talked to who's gone through it has said it's NOTHING compared to chemo. Amen to that. <br />
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGJl3gGmabLCHts0iUfltcGRaY32kHEAaVERw5mw41c6RAQqAX_lrzjum6jFWRCisddhL3Wpkace6riRHXhJ4lsPdODiaJhC-Hlt1LrPtdR8gXhFIl6c03unjFh8wjFpmOih5sKAYqc95-/s1600/photo.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGJl3gGmabLCHts0iUfltcGRaY32kHEAaVERw5mw41c6RAQqAX_lrzjum6jFWRCisddhL3Wpkace6riRHXhJ4lsPdODiaJhC-Hlt1LrPtdR8gXhFIl6c03unjFh8wjFpmOih5sKAYqc95-/s200/photo.JPG" width="149" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Kimberly, Tracey, and Me<br />
</td></tr>
</tbody></table>After my appointment I had lunch with two of my cancer friends, Kimberly and Tracey. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE them! We compared war stories and Tracey (who's a year out from treatment) was awesome to talk to and get a perspective on what comes "next" so to speak. We have all had completely different experiences, although Tracey and I had virtually the same regimen. Kimberly has had a much rougher regimen but is doing so great. Some things have been harder on her than were on me, and vice versa. We can all agree that the going bald and crappy taste in the mouth completely suck. Again, I am so fortunate to have people around me who are not only inspirational but sympathetic! <br />
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGRSxE9uoOt3o09G8wAOL3B3ax_xKVp_kUcuuRFky-A04iMgWy3QRHXqCHaYtqNCGBwfX_zFrq4sBbMp5HPEaktcrruO2Q7BfBMMr7l5Kiy91wxaQt1_-tnNlN1nEUpm98tbweYYIWDR5j/s1600/photo+(1).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGRSxE9uoOt3o09G8wAOL3B3ax_xKVp_kUcuuRFky-A04iMgWy3QRHXqCHaYtqNCGBwfX_zFrq4sBbMp5HPEaktcrruO2Q7BfBMMr7l5Kiy91wxaQt1_-tnNlN1nEUpm98tbweYYIWDR5j/s200/photo+(1).JPG" width="149" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Aren't hey PERFECT?</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<br />
When I got home I was so excited to see that the new walking shoes I bought especially for the 3 Day came. They are so...pink and cute! They even have the 3 Day logo on them. I can't wait to start breaking them in. I'm going to wait a few days since I've come down with my first cold in about five months. I totally jinxed myself by saying I'd made it through the whole chemo process without so much as a cold. Now here I am. I've definitely had worse, it's mostly in my chest and throat, but it certainly adds to my fatigue. I literally have about two hours of good energy, but then I feel like I need to sleep for two. Fortunately it's all worked out well with my job and I've been able to go at a slow pace and do what I need to do. The weather is so beautiful today and I noticed new leaves sprouting on one of my hydrangeas. It's going to be a GREAT spring and summer...I just know it! <br />
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Go <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4r7wHMg5Yjg" target="_blank">Honey Badgers!</a>Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-1005888240174234562012-03-03T21:44:00.000-05:002012-03-03T21:44:13.610-05:00Hasta La Vista-CHEMO!This past Tuesday was my fourth and FINAL round of chemo. OMG-I am so relieved it's over! As lovely as the staff at the infusion center were, I hope I NEVER have to see those people again in my life! Don't get me wrong, I would definitely recommend it. I'm just going to ASSUME chemotherapy will never again be part of my treatment plans and they will all become a distant memory...have a nice life! <br />
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVXnuBwnpY9hNjZS9JvtjecKY6HGWz7zGB_tQlJbsV-cwXmTLHH57B-0P9MP7TrRJc5gQ1AzZhOCRTK_16KjSFunmsJ0KdR89mMe_5FZGBfDN_GRsAoHWBMaRX6zdnE4z6G7O_RXDUgadt/s1600/005.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVXnuBwnpY9hNjZS9JvtjecKY6HGWz7zGB_tQlJbsV-cwXmTLHH57B-0P9MP7TrRJc5gQ1AzZhOCRTK_16KjSFunmsJ0KdR89mMe_5FZGBfDN_GRsAoHWBMaRX6zdnE4z6G7O_RXDUgadt/s200/005.JPG" uda="true" width="150" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Nurse Kim<br />
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</tbody></table><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">It was certainly a day to celebrate for my family and I. I got up in the morning to a dozen pink roses from my husband and we were all in good spirits. All of my blood counts were normal (they sort of love me for my stellar blood work) which again meant no Neulasta injection after chemo. I dodged such a bullet with that stuff. Only one injection through the entire course of chemo, thank God! </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">My nurse for the day was the lovely Kim. She was very nice and efficient and I could not have been more pleased with my overall care there. </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKgMFtn5YqgGuWHvJ_5Cpue1hretcj7YU12uK5urrYNgkR7n0hqe3Ss17QLjOW9YxF4NVeIYmuvaid_c7EYK5W6DV9j2eCe4Vfe89qhrqotRuHty6k4TA8_7cLW8ubbfUJXfJpaAdG2Nw4/s1600/004.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKgMFtn5YqgGuWHvJ_5Cpue1hretcj7YU12uK5urrYNgkR7n0hqe3Ss17QLjOW9YxF4NVeIYmuvaid_c7EYK5W6DV9j2eCe4Vfe89qhrqotRuHty6k4TA8_7cLW8ubbfUJXfJpaAdG2Nw4/s200/004.JPG" uda="true" width="200" /></a></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">My usual group escorted me in today. Jeff, his dad Howard, my mom Gail, </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">and my aunt Diane. We got a private room again which is so nice to have. We were visited by a man named Roy who is a 7 year survivor and now works as a volunteer. He was very nice and had a great sense of humor. I can see myself doing that someday. I didn't get to know any of the patients since my treatments were so spread out, I didn't see any of the same people when I was there. I think it would have been nice to build a relationship with someone else going through it, but most people are pre-occupied with family and friends anyway so that's a little difficult to do. I'd feel bad for someone going at it alone...although I'm sure some people prefer to just handle it by themselves. </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">After getting through the infusion, I officially became a chemo graduate. Yahoo! They presented me with a certificate signed by the staff and that puppy will be cherished-I tell you what! Here's a picture of my family and I after receiving it (Howard is taking the pic). </div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTvtmXzm7ls0XyGMo_yTd2us7hurg3QAzjqj0BfJmmloskcH39iLLRTMrpnoxgn4TWTZoFmSFq3YyHAE4BLYPXIgvrB0xT0zj52Lw8oe8RTL3IKa9DnVXgdqbQFVlXzEVIqEoaCq-AIoyn/s1600/006.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTvtmXzm7ls0XyGMo_yTd2us7hurg3QAzjqj0BfJmmloskcH39iLLRTMrpnoxgn4TWTZoFmSFq3YyHAE4BLYPXIgvrB0xT0zj52Lw8oe8RTL3IKa9DnVXgdqbQFVlXzEVIqEoaCq-AIoyn/s400/006.JPG" uda="true" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: left;">Also when you "graduate" from chemo, they have this tile collage at the Cancer Partnership and you get to add a tile in your name. they were out of light pink tiles for Breast Cancer, so I just used a dark pink one for mine. It's hard to tell but it has my name on it and the date I finished. I will never forget 2/28/12!</div><div align="left" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: right;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIF_lTKO-tNmEmkxCQNswrC-xgl62jur7kBp3RHJ226UW4H67Hck_AnrEGBUuIj7481zbv2GtwcLyZhMnFgru1GerXJYifjB4Wuaktz13MeBN1tKp0RviJU1Mzxq06SfhEMJa-gJNi1J3k/s1600/Tile+Cropped.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIF_lTKO-tNmEmkxCQNswrC-xgl62jur7kBp3RHJ226UW4H67Hck_AnrEGBUuIj7481zbv2GtwcLyZhMnFgru1GerXJYifjB4Wuaktz13MeBN1tKp0RviJU1Mzxq06SfhEMJa-gJNi1J3k/s200/Tile+Cropped.jpg" uda="true" width="200" /></a></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: right;"></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: right;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOnI5LwOukHCjZ_21fPjDbBhenYX790d8mpMkWhyF5uMSsPL09QWdv4cXD_mKj2WfGjPgWyUdbW5LWOSGEhncf1oh7vmV3x7KDBzSTl_ErxtHJkm6vdrP2og__57xVldmWbF3_6Zn9yo0I/s1600/007.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; height: 243px; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; width: 201px;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOnI5LwOukHCjZ_21fPjDbBhenYX790d8mpMkWhyF5uMSsPL09QWdv4cXD_mKj2WfGjPgWyUdbW5LWOSGEhncf1oh7vmV3x7KDBzSTl_ErxtHJkm6vdrP2og__57xVldmWbF3_6Zn9yo0I/s200/007.JPG" uda="true" width="200" /></a> </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: right;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;">So here I am, a few days out from my last treatment, and it's been a rough couple of days. I get terrible muscle and joint aches from the Taxol, and the fatigue is just a given at this point. Again, I know I am so fortunate to have tolerated things as well as I have-even making through the last four months with not so much as a cold! (knock on wood). I think everyday of the people who struggle much worse than me, and whose roads are so much longer. I have a consultation with my Radiation Oncologist next week, and we'll map out the next several weeks of radiation treatment. After that, I'll be on a drug called Tomoxofin (sp) for five years which I look at as my "maintenance" program. I will see my Oncologist every 3 months for the next year and will have my first mammogram six months after I finish radiation. I can't help but feel that I've left the scenic route of this trip and will be heading down the long boring highway of recovery and remission. Hey, I'm all for long and boring! </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;">So much will be happening the next few months that I am excited for! Back to boot camp, a bunch of 5k races I've entered, and the Susan G. Komen 3 Day in September. I have SO much to work and look forward to! I am so thankful to have all of these opportunities ahead of me and could not have made it through without all the people who love and support me. Thank you all!</div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIF_lTKO-tNmEmkxCQNswrC-xgl62jur7kBp3RHJ226UW4H67Hck_AnrEGBUuIj7481zbv2GtwcLyZhMnFgru1GerXJYifjB4Wuaktz13MeBN1tKp0RviJU1Mzxq06SfhEMJa-gJNi1J3k/s1600/Tile+Cropped.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"></a></div>Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-7669656824715706232012-02-26T10:46:00.000-05:002012-02-26T10:46:41.858-05:00THE BEST THING EVER!Actually, three things. <br />
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1. Tuesday is my last chemo treatment! Yay! I am so excited to be done with that nonsense. <br />
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2. I TOTALLY exceeded my fundraising goal for the Susan G. Komen 3 Day (thank you to all my awesome and generous peeps).<br />
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3. This is the best, but allow me to do a little recap. I adopted the "Honey Badger" as my mascot because it <br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">helps me to visualize the chemo as an aggressive creature eating all the cancer cells. I got the idea from this youtube video <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4r7wHMg5Yjg" target="_blank">Honey Badger</a>. So the lovely Carol Lange (one of the nurses at the Healthline) made this for me. Yes, it's a Honey Badger cross stitch. Can you believe it? <strong>BEST. THING. EVER</strong>. </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinl8hNm6MFa_nGTVG2wytJJg3JjrWCPGz_GGFl-I_mrr-vZyOcceWqjrNILPQDedy5GunGBCwndoXfk9bpjiNxc95yYsD_z_NxNQPMs6RA9N5fg6nnzvoafhMxNWlDjpR-WlJ_v_tdBC7i/s1600/Honey+Badger.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" lda="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinl8hNm6MFa_nGTVG2wytJJg3JjrWCPGz_GGFl-I_mrr-vZyOcceWqjrNILPQDedy5GunGBCwndoXfk9bpjiNxc95yYsD_z_NxNQPMs6RA9N5fg6nnzvoafhMxNWlDjpR-WlJ_v_tdBC7i/s320/Honey+Badger.JPG" width="239" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;">Thank you everyone for all of the love and support. I'm so excited to put this all behind me and move forward. I feel so blessed to have had such an AMAZING support system from day one. XOXO</div>Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-9231982227732607922012-02-25T12:50:00.000-05:002012-02-25T12:50:03.674-05:00Thank YouI cannot even begin to thank my supporters enough. As I mentioned a couple of posts ago, I've signed up to participate in the Susan G. Komen 3 Day Walk. It's 60 miles in 3 days and I am SUPER excited to be a part of it. I put the word out less than two weeks ago and as of yesterday I've raised $2,680-surpassing my goal of $2,300. Un-fricking-believable!<br />
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So many people donated to help me and I am so humbled by your generosity. I promise to not forget your kindess and will do my best to pay it forward. <br />
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Thank you from the bottom of my heart!<br />
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<a border="0" href="http://www.the3day.org/site/PageServer?pagename=homepage"><img alt="" src="http://www.the3day.org/images/content/pagebuilder/LogoFPO.png?t=1321970709432" /></a><br />
<a href="http://www.the3day.org/site/TR/2012/SeattleEvent2012?px=6481243&pg=personal&fr_id=1769">http://www.the3day.org/site/TR/2012/SeattleEvent2012?px=6481243&pg=personal&fr_id=1769</a>Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-60383988394162805632012-02-15T15:06:00.000-05:002012-02-15T15:06:29.101-05:00Whoever Said You Lose Weight On Chemo LIED!How shallow, right? Who would care about a little weight gain in the midst of cancer treatment? Well, this Chiquita Banana is obsessed with it. It was all fun and games when the doc TELLS you not to lose weight and they practically do backflips when you put on a few ounces. I tend to be slightly competitive and figured a few ounces was nothing, how cool would it be if I put on a few pounds? As of this morning...14. OMG! STOP! <br />
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Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know now is not the time to be concerned by such trivial and vain things. I think I wouldn't be if I hadn't just spent the last year of my life working my ass off (literally) at boot camp-five days a week. I know I'll be back to my old/new self in a few months and muscle memory is my friend. It's such a bummer though! I should be out walking and eating only organic veggie smoothies and fish, but I want comfort food dammit! My most recent obsession; chocolate covered marshmallow hearts. Yep, sounds disgusting to most of you. I am, however, like a pregnant woman and cannot get enough of those little lovelies. Jeff gave me five of them (yes five) along with a giant tub of red licorice for Valentine's Day. Can you say enabler? Kidding. It's not his fault and like any other crack addict, I'd drive to the store at 2am to get my fix if need be. <br />
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On the bright side, I only have one more round of chemo left. I'm figuring it'll take me about 10 days to get over that and then back to boot camp for me. Get ready Peri-Lyn. I'm counting on you to whip me back in to shape. I'm doing the St. Patty's Day Dash in March, the Susan G. Komen 5k in June, and the big Susan G. 3 day in September. I'd better get training! <br />
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This last round of chemo hit me pretty hard. More fatigue than I've had before and very unpleasant body aches-mostly in the legs. My Oncologist-bless his heart-gave me a scrip for Vicodin and they are my favorite thing in the whole world. I'm feeling better now and still have plenty left to get me through my last round on February 28th. AHHHHHH! I cannot WAIT to be DONE!<br />
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In case you all need a reminder and a laugh watch this; <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4r7wHMg5Yjg" target="_blank">my official mascot the honey badger</a>.<br />
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One more thing I SWEAR this was made just for ME- <a href="http://www.bravotv.com/watch-what-happens-live/season-6/videos/honey-badger-gets-nasty-with-the-housewives" target="_blank">http://www.bravotv.com/watch-what-happens-live/season-6/videos/honey-badger-gets-nasty-with-the-housewives</a>Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-80162402654759757092012-02-13T23:39:00.002-05:002012-02-13T23:47:23.586-05:00I'm Going For A Walk<div style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.the3day.org/site/TR/2012/General?px=6481243&pg=personal&fr_id=1769" target="_blank"><span style="color: black; font-size: large;">60 Miles in three days. I CAN DO THIS! Will you help me?</span></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIM7NyV0Zddhz3ZYCfHUpX-YWvP03iibUfjYz6cDEFu2hy_Yduecc-T1KiEXu-seAWjn8AUHjN2pZop-nY15LtO5lTvtGK5KBAiayMHM06eGr-EqGWMhteoJzBWjzgypEhycvYjrVbNiSp/s1600/LogoFPO.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="background-color: black;"><img border="0" height="126" sda="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIM7NyV0Zddhz3ZYCfHUpX-YWvP03iibUfjYz6cDEFu2hy_Yduecc-T1KiEXu-seAWjn8AUHjN2pZop-nY15LtO5lTvtGK5KBAiayMHM06eGr-EqGWMhteoJzBWjzgypEhycvYjrVbNiSp/s200/LogoFPO.png" width="200" /></span></a></div>Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-61772339857243092992012-02-08T16:47:00.000-05:002012-02-08T16:47:25.379-05:00We're On The Home Stretch Now Baby!<div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqKYdpTRUJuG7yCU5wp-QKqsAWiLnCHn_XmNRHHOB3FyC5EVyIxMXqhyphenhyphenL0u4Ztg5uwcOjJw_nKyqlXH-6CHe-XOcljzO-ubkuYV9c5Z3IO5_4Uv49TtdZnX2HO8x5htZq06T1_G5sG88us/s1600/001.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" sda="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqKYdpTRUJuG7yCU5wp-QKqsAWiLnCHn_XmNRHHOB3FyC5EVyIxMXqhyphenhyphenL0u4Ztg5uwcOjJw_nKyqlXH-6CHe-XOcljzO-ubkuYV9c5Z3IO5_4Uv49TtdZnX2HO8x5htZq06T1_G5sG88us/s200/001.JPG" width="200" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Yay! Round three is done! I saw my Oncologist before my infusion yesterday and every single one of my labs was normal. Which means...no crappy Neulasta shot and no anemia for me. What a relief! My body seems to bounce back really quickly from the chemo-probably because of my year of hard work getting into shape. Reason number 7,850,000 why I love Snohomish Boot Camp. </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqztQgur0KUKx9RYV4vVcxS4WWiUqhZv6LeyDIBUPRa0HZt7aOvfakpYkOk2LiX8aAvzd8iT6kbFa4xSl2_qpkyBrD0fgPmTI_LI1XQN75zaZrGjT1FaEogJ-ijwjpd-3XbT0jlFIePRr-/s1600/004.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" sda="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqztQgur0KUKx9RYV4vVcxS4WWiUqhZv6LeyDIBUPRa0HZt7aOvfakpYkOk2LiX8aAvzd8iT6kbFa4xSl2_qpkyBrD0fgPmTI_LI1XQN75zaZrGjT1FaEogJ-ijwjpd-3XbT0jlFIePRr-/s200/004.JPG" width="200" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOkbDVKHUGcXTHq6W6ykQrbxeqBPg_8Fc5rfqXp6pGBmyAlLJi6OmpFNuSxJmLkmfHqO3JcQxD2lJDjU-q9wzCILevf34eIepvxKaa6MdQXWSyAzofDy6MRgVUetcmxoyQ1wyP1A5mbw6W/s1600/003.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" sda="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOkbDVKHUGcXTHq6W6ykQrbxeqBPg_8Fc5rfqXp6pGBmyAlLJi6OmpFNuSxJmLkmfHqO3JcQxD2lJDjU-q9wzCILevf34eIepvxKaa6MdQXWSyAzofDy6MRgVUetcmxoyQ1wyP1A5mbw6W/s200/003.JPG" width="200" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTECOAj8_V35ZwiLnuNXqyyYTvm32X9cefEK9W4gseV2-fCcrgPPph1UnkGYBi6ZEqpWvU_kaimYa9mXOiJGqtAd_S-HQ8j-nZbzLux-JBpls5DipGvSDftGDGeO7VL_PbOH-WEBjrlezg/s1600/007.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" sda="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTECOAj8_V35ZwiLnuNXqyyYTvm32X9cefEK9W4gseV2-fCcrgPPph1UnkGYBi6ZEqpWvU_kaimYa9mXOiJGqtAd_S-HQ8j-nZbzLux-JBpls5DipGvSDftGDGeO7VL_PbOH-WEBjrlezg/s200/007.JPG" width="200" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzuqCiaRgrjrTJwF_UPx88TYNhXvpV8bWyeBkEQBv6Iy9rzlg-EdBxa1ZR9X9pJS5GS0LKtbCi5dtwWNJVMO8tXOKB3E9T6TWkQ7Be4u_hgKIxnOmYQJ1wVjoc_0Tp4nlg0fjOX-K9l6kh/s1600/006.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" sda="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzuqCiaRgrjrTJwF_UPx88TYNhXvpV8bWyeBkEQBv6Iy9rzlg-EdBxa1ZR9X9pJS5GS0LKtbCi5dtwWNJVMO8tXOKB3E9T6TWkQ7Be4u_hgKIxnOmYQJ1wVjoc_0Tp4nlg0fjOX-K9l6kh/s200/006.JPG" width="200" /></a>I got to the infusion fully decked out. Pink from head to toe (basically) including pink glitter nail polish my nursey friend Linda gave me, which matches my pink glitter Tom's. I had my new Honey Badger head piece to get the party started (thank you Peg! You are so sweet!), and my entourage were at their best. My nurse for the day was miss Chanel as in Chanel No. 5 and she was DREAMY. Joining me were my mom, my aunt, Jeff, his dad, and his mom. It was busy in there yesterday (sadly enough) so my crew had to take turns visiting, but it was fun. Yes, I just said my chemo infusion was fun. It's so great to know I only have one more of these suckers left! My doc said a week after my next infusion I'll meet with the Radiation Oncologist to set up my radiation treatments. There'll be a total of 33 of those puppies, five days a week until they are done. Everyone I've talked to says it's a piece of cake compared to chemo so I'm banking on that. </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">So far post treatment I'm doing ok. Things definitely hit faster after each time. The horrible taste in my mouth is back at it's worst and I'm super tired. My stomach feels ok though. I expect to have some body aches from the Taxol in the next few days, but hope after about five days I'll be on the upswing again and feeling great. </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div> <table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNGdNdZfsRPnDIHgcyWUEmNMDKrFM0smuyzudcSw1v6X-GKxkg53Fprxqcle27VzW-UXq6sY-ouAHsCfdAPMPFr-6nmiyQkXN5J9lBRCRoX8Te9ZL0dRmJms5172UEGkBvq5VY8Gv5V2oB/s1600/005.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" sda="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNGdNdZfsRPnDIHgcyWUEmNMDKrFM0smuyzudcSw1v6X-GKxkg53Fprxqcle27VzW-UXq6sY-ouAHsCfdAPMPFr-6nmiyQkXN5J9lBRCRoX8Te9ZL0dRmJms5172UEGkBvq5VY8Gv5V2oB/s200/005.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Nurse Chanel</td></tr>
</tbody></table> <div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Once again, thanks for all the love and support! I have to give a shout out to a couple more of my nursey peeps; Laura who sends me the cutest cards for each treatment (you are the best) and Cindy, who has also taken the time to mail me little bits of inspiration. It totally makes my day to get happy mail like that. </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Have a wonderful day people. Go Honey Badgers! </div>Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-73041003526198193542012-02-07T12:48:00.000-05:002012-02-07T12:48:36.554-05:00It's Good To Have Props<div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrV2q-X0wBL3vctyPI5srbKK90-DVHyP5C9CqNmG8P96PeMIKkFLIPcmwMlt6LyK5o6MWmkqLeoolxzS_NgzjA_ttpHG9dM1rmajXjG9qUnGPr3ONNZiJ84g4_aLT-Gfs32FxGzIPBZ8QM/s1600/Honey+Badger+Costume.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" sda="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrV2q-X0wBL3vctyPI5srbKK90-DVHyP5C9CqNmG8P96PeMIKkFLIPcmwMlt6LyK5o6MWmkqLeoolxzS_NgzjA_ttpHG9dM1rmajXjG9qUnGPr3ONNZiJ84g4_aLT-Gfs32FxGzIPBZ8QM/s200/Honey+Badger+Costume.JPG" width="200" /></a></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">As you know, my war against breast cancer has been titled "Operation Honey Badger". Well, someone sent me a key prop for this fight...a Honey Badger head piece. I love it! Whoever you are, thank you. I will be bringing it to my third treatment today.</div>Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-56285562528416313132012-02-02T20:28:00.000-05:002012-02-02T20:28:23.797-05:00Expanding My VocabularyI watched the movie "50/50" the other day with Seth Rogan. It's based on the true story of Seth's real life friend who battled a soft tissue cancer of the spine when he was just 27. The movie was actually very funny and quite touching at times, I definitely recommend it. While watching the movie I realized something. Cancer patients have their own vocabulary. <br />
<br />
I guess it's similar to anyone with a very specific skillset in their job, words you use on a regular basis that have no business in your normal everyday life. <br />
<br />
As a breast cancer patient I've become intimately familiar with the following words/terms:<br />
<br />
Regimen<br />
Diagnosis<br />
Counts<br />
Port<br />
Neutraphil<br />
Hormone Receptive<br />
Invasive<br />
Infusion<br />
Prognosis<br />
Treatment<br />
Metastasis<br />
Lymph Nodes<br />
Biopsy<br />
Oncology<br />
Hematology<br />
Staging<br />
Tolerate<br />
Survivor<br />
<br />
...and many more I can't think of right now because I have chemo brain (that is totally for real BTW). The last one is my favorite. Watching the movie I could relate so much to some of what he was portrayed as feeling. What I thought was the most true to my experience was the moment he was being taken into surgery and he broke down. It's so easy to be all "I got this" and "I'll be stong", but when it comes down to it, we're all terrified. I broke down too when they wheeled me away from my family for my surgery...it was just too flippin' real.<br />
<br />
I do find so much comfort in the fact that there is a whole community within this cancer crap. I love hearing about other people and their experiences. A woman came up to me in the mall and asked me if I was a breast cancer patient (I don't know if it was the bald head and the pink glitter shoes that gave it away, but I'm assuming so). She was a fellow survivor and we instantly struck up a conversation about our specific diagnosis and treatments etc. What was unfortunate is the fact she is currently battling Lymphoma (which they think was brought on by the chemo-lovely huh?), but she was so sweet and optimistic and I was so glad to meet her. <br />
<br />
I'm doing really well, although very tired this week for some reason. I have my third treatment next Tuesday (yay!) and my biggest hope is that in addition to tolerating it well, my Neutraphils are up. At my last appointment they were down from 19,000 to 2,000. Yeah, total bummer. The doctor told me if they don't decrease, I won't have to get the shot of Neulasta. I was also told I was borderline anemic, so they'll be keeping an eye on that. The good news is that means the chemo is doing its job. <br />
<br />
As time goes by I'm getting very anxious for the next couple of months to move quickly. I can't wait for spring and summer and I can't wait for my stupid hair to grow back. Bald is acceptable, but I certainly don't feel beautiful. Nobody gives me a hard time, but I am self conscious and people do stare. I also plan on walking in the 3 day this September in Seattle, which will be a big undertaking but I'm up for the challenge...anyone with me? <br />
<br />
That's all for now!<br />
<br />
Go Honey Badgers!!!!!Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-91593912710612765992012-01-30T19:11:00.001-05:002012-01-30T19:11:53.674-05:00Mandi Singing<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/kXX8v0kWV9I?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div>Here's a video of my daughter, Mandi, singing Saturday night at the Snohomish High School talent show. I am so proud of my girl! Her biggest idol right now is Lady Gaga so she sang "You and I". I think Miss Gaga would be proud of this "Little Monster" (that's the pet name she has for her fans). Enjoy the show!Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-3478741418181772572012-01-28T11:21:00.004-05:002012-01-28T11:29:41.004-05:00Let's Get Serious For A MomentI didn't realize it's been almost a week since I'd posted anything. No news is good news in my world! <br />
<br />
I've been feeling well. Well enough in fact to attend <a href="https://sites.google.com/site/snohomishbootcamps/" target="_blank">Snohomish Boot Camp</a> twice (I've got the sore hamstrings to prove it-thank you Peri-Lyn!). Other than the residual disgusting taste in my mouth, all is very well. <br />
<br />
So, let's talk about death. I'm not morbid or fascinated by the whole thing, but I would be a liar if I told you it wasn't on my mind more than a few times these past couple of months. This is not going to be about religion and the after life either (you and I can discuss that privately at some point if you'd like), I'm simply talking about the actual moment of death. <br />
<br />
I remember when I was a little girl being told a story about the death of my great-grandmother and namesake, Libby. My grandma and great aunt swore that just before her death, she sat up in her chair and said the words "hi mama" then she died. The same great aunt told the story of my own grandmother's death in which a couple of days before she had a massive stroke, she saw a little dog in her house that kept wanting her to follow it. She believed that little dog was "coming to take her away". She wasn't frightened, comforted in fact. Both stories certainly make me feel that at the end of their lives they were in some small way at peace. <br />
<br />
So how does this relate to me? Well, Jeff and I saw the movie <a href="http://thegreythemovie.com/" target="_blank">The Grey</a> last night and I LOVED it. Jeff liked it too but the annoying woman sitting next to him ruined his comfort so he didn't have quite the same experience. Anyway, I don't want to spoil anything for you, but the way they portrayed death in the movie was beautiful. I was a blubbering fool because, shall we say, it hit home. At one point Liam Neeson (phenomenal in this role) tells a man he is dying and not to be afraid. He asks him "who is it that you love?" and after the man responds he says "let them take you there". The whole movie I kept thinking; I hope that's how it is. <br />
<br />
I know it will be a great many years until I'm faced with that moment myself. I hope when my time comes that it is my baby girl at her sweetest self, or my wonderfully loving husband holding my hand, or perhaps someone who has gone before like my grandparents that come to walk me through. <br />
<br />
I hope I haven't bummed anybody out...sorry if I did. The reality is we are all going to die and it's a scary prospect, especially for someone living on the edge of it. I, for one, feel a little better thinking the people I love most-alive or dead-will be with me when it happens. <br />
<br />
Just to lighten the mood...did you see the new <br />
<a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video/6618829/nastyass-honey-badger-pistachio-commercial" target="_blank">Honey Badger Pistaccio commercial? Love it!!!!</a>Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-4706951965530586442012-01-22T23:26:00.000-05:002012-01-22T23:26:56.216-05:00The Top Ten Reasons Cancer Is AwesomeNo, I have not gone insane from the poison pumping through my veins. Like every cloud there is a silver lining, and a cancer diagnosis is no exception. <br />
<br />
<strong>10.</strong> Priorities tend to become very clear. When you truly are faced with the fact that your world can be changed in the blink of an eye, it certainly changes the way you look at things. For the time being a sink full of dirty dishes will not send me into a fit of rage. <br />
<br />
<strong>9.</strong> People like to feed cancer patients. I have had the most delicious lasagna, enchiladas, chicken, cookies, cakes, brownies, and much more. Thank you! My future boot camp self also thanks you for the additional weight to lose. <br />
<br />
<strong>8.</strong> Doctors tell you NOT to lose weight. I have never once been told not to lose weight until I started chemo. When I was up some weight at my last appointment, I almost got a high five from the nurse. I think I can oblige this command from my doc.<br />
<br />
<strong>7.</strong> Sleeping as much as you want is allowed. I like this one because I am a napper by design. I love to curl up in the middle of the day and snooze for an hour. I love being able to do it without the nagging guilt that I should be doing something productive. Although I guess regenerating cells and fighting infection could be considered productive so it's a win/win for me!<br />
<br />
<strong>6.</strong> I have an excuse to wear pink every day of my life. Who isn't happy wearing pink? <br />
<br />
<strong>5.</strong> I don't have to blow dry or curl my hair. I do have "phantom hair syndrome" though. Essentially it's the same thing as "phantom limb syndrome" (when people who've had a limb removed still feel the pain or an itch), but I find myself reaching up to brush my hair out of my face. The worst is after showering. I still reach up to wring out my hair and flip my head down and twist the towel around my head. It really is a strange sensation. <br />
<br />
<strong>4.</strong> I get to cry and hug people without being thought of as a crazy person. Shhh...don't tell anyone. I'm still a little crazy. <br />
<br />
<strong>3.</strong> I have not shaved my legs or armpits in weeks. Sorry if that grosses you out, but THANK YOU CHEMO from the bottom of this dark haired, bushy eyebrowed girl. <br />
<br />
<strong>2.</strong> Every day feels like a gift. Every sunrise, sunset, rain storm, snow storm, clear sky, cloudy sky, sunny day, all of it-causes me to pause and say thank you and I will do my best not to take it for granted. <br />
<br />
<strong><em>And the number one reason cancer is awesome is....</em></strong><br />
<br />
<br />
<strong><em>Feeling the love from everyone around me.</em></strong> <br />
<br />
<br />
I have learned first hand what an amazingly supportive and loving family I have. I know there are people in my life that would jump in front of a train or run down a specialist without hesitation if it meant I would feel or be treated better.<br />
<br />
I've realized too what a fantastic group of non-family people I have around me. My employers, my friends, my boot camp peeps. Thanks for rallying and keeping me moving along. <br />
<br />
I have also been so lucky to reconnect with good friends that have been sort of "lost" along the way over the years, like my high school buddies. It's a shame it took this kind of event to wake me up and get me reconnected. I'm sad for the lost years I could have been surrounded by amazing people but grateful to have from this day forward. Thanks girls!<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiF90oPlGyIzzzep2DlrAXd2_HjUCsm7zD3k9jSNIg3Qhc-uSsVollQ3_dfjrV64isG3uPfNvxJ3MUsp3og9xOVX-CwBF1_oZMIPB090rf4onVvnCqYDCid5O6pTlGjDRhiQykcdYQYC6Nn/s1600/Girls+at+lunch.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" nfa="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiF90oPlGyIzzzep2DlrAXd2_HjUCsm7zD3k9jSNIg3Qhc-uSsVollQ3_dfjrV64isG3uPfNvxJ3MUsp3og9xOVX-CwBF1_oZMIPB090rf4onVvnCqYDCid5O6pTlGjDRhiQykcdYQYC6Nn/s1600/Girls+at+lunch.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Brenda, Suzanne, Diana, Emily<br />
Suzanne, Me</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-60797560008498105882012-01-21T00:15:00.001-05:002012-01-21T00:17:30.046-05:00CAUTION!! Whining Ahead!<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirfIkWPXM9AH0mVDRXRFxktq7U4FwvSxrxu0gCPmHb-RKc0npc9CLy_pSOP2_WHvLDJ3pzySTFg5B3PHiOuQWZw0-uwUCQbELwIkdLRNB9GUv4mqZwb1PjeBjBHGTWtETXv9kohhufYX8w/s1600/P1170792.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" nfa="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirfIkWPXM9AH0mVDRXRFxktq7U4FwvSxrxu0gCPmHb-RKc0npc9CLy_pSOP2_WHvLDJ3pzySTFg5B3PHiOuQWZw0-uwUCQbELwIkdLRNB9GUv4mqZwb1PjeBjBHGTWtETXv9kohhufYX8w/s200/P1170792.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Kenny and Tracy Larsen delivering our dinner</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Major shout out to the wonderful Larsen girl's! Kylie and Lily-who play for Jeff-made us the most wonderful enchiladas and brownies a couple of days ago. I mean really-what great girls! How many 13 year old's would take the time to make a nice meal for a family going through something they'd just gone through with their mom? What good hearts you two have. Thank you so much for thinking of us! Jeff has an issue with Hostess products, so they threw in a box of Twinkies just because (I think Miss Collette Campbell may be responsible for those-thank you!)<br />
<br />
Waaaaaaaaah. I've been told I have one hour to complain, so here goes. <br />
<br />
I don't feel real well. My stomach hurts and I have a HORRIBLE taste in my mouth. Eating helps, but as soon as I swallow the food, I'm right back to square one. Peppermint Trident works for a little while but doesn't get rid of it completely. <br />
<br />
My legs are achy and my nose is so dry it's driving me crazy. Jeff is forcing me to watch "Dual Survival" for the ten millionth time and I am annoyed. Thank goodness the snow is melting and I got out of the house today otherwise I wouldn't be able to guarantee the safety of my lovely family. <br />
<br />
I would like to go on vacation...somewhere warm would be nice. I'm thinking I have a window of opportunity between my last round of chemo and when I start radiation four weeks later, so I may try to make a break for it (if they'll let me). This time of years is always tough for me given our climate, but it's even worse now with this chemo nonsense. <br />
<br />
Ho hum...just one of those days. Lest you think I don't know how lucky I am, I do. So many have it SO much worse and handle it with such grace, who am I to complain? I struggle with that myself, but IT IS WHAT IT IS. This sucks for any one going through it. It sucks just not feeling like yourself, whether it's cancer or a cold. I know I'll feel better in a couple of days, but I'm starting to struggle with the idea that I'll have to do it all over again in a couple of weeks. I can see how people get really down in the dumps over what a daunting task it is and I have so much empathy for them. FYI, it's not always an issue of "attitude" and "getting over it". I believe there is a real physiological component involved with your body fighting not only a disease, but fighting the medications that are supposed to make you better. It's almost impossible to know if what you're feeling is a reaction to the meds or the illness itself. You live constantly on the edge of being depressed, frustrated, overwhelmed, sad, irritable, annoyed...you get where I'm going with this. Such a pain in the butt! <br />
<br />
Sooooooooooo....that is my rant for the moment. Now Jeff has switched from "Dual Survival" to MMA fighting. Oh brother. I suppose I could pull the cancer card and switch to "Project Runway" or "Dance Moms". I'm thinking he'd last less than one minute with either of those shows, so maybe I'll just take some drugs, read my book, and go to bed. Aaaaahhh...everything is always better in the morning.Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-36067785941722882772012-01-18T00:55:00.000-05:002012-01-18T00:55:31.243-05:00Half Way Baby!<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLEdfVQsnSaxNd7zoRXYyKtZwEL4CuL9ikg4ENgedS7fS_zAk48QrB6ME5alYfuoczXp4QUikksn2jPwybK6T_J6VCVhYC_6qmhj0zl9weD2Q0SZKfPQXJFgI8MITsIDeuDZ77fOmbdJeB/s1600/P1170667.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" kba="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLEdfVQsnSaxNd7zoRXYyKtZwEL4CuL9ikg4ENgedS7fS_zAk48QrB6ME5alYfuoczXp4QUikksn2jPwybK6T_J6VCVhYC_6qmhj0zl9weD2Q0SZKfPQXJFgI8MITsIDeuDZ77fOmbdJeB/s200/P1170667.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My cat Boo-just because he's so cute!<br />
<br />
<br />
</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Can I get an amen? AMEN! <br />
<br />
<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_HHj1WwY1Q1I6CwDYKFHcb6_ryBAia5pgBEHGzieij_k0_YfBwrW8S3kz89C8IfHkb6jyipHRVCotPjZnmzXFB5AKVwwRbls3NV55S0Qiva6D3PhSYyea761liRKvZs6JbOPvDq4aQPeW/s1600/P1170791.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" kba="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_HHj1WwY1Q1I6CwDYKFHcb6_ryBAia5pgBEHGzieij_k0_YfBwrW8S3kz89C8IfHkb6jyipHRVCotPjZnmzXFB5AKVwwRbls3NV55S0Qiva6D3PhSYyea761liRKvZs6JbOPvDq4aQPeW/s200/P1170791.JPG" width="150" /></a></div><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibqgczWUsZGk8hhE4SFNM0CGMQ27gFRQAzZ34YIC62ggme2ryJxWbpP0xPh4_RYZcD_ZrEGq-BU1LgCJ-yrwE93NhtPCLONVABvVvX-6XF_sqBB2mt-BE0og6jsX1Lj73ZcgGHkNUSWRhJ/s1600/P1170784.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" kba="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibqgczWUsZGk8hhE4SFNM0CGMQ27gFRQAzZ34YIC62ggme2ryJxWbpP0xPh4_RYZcD_ZrEGq-BU1LgCJ-yrwE93NhtPCLONVABvVvX-6XF_sqBB2mt-BE0og6jsX1Lj73ZcgGHkNUSWRhJ/s200/P1170784.JPG" width="150" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Kath</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">I got a call yesterday from Dr. Jiang letting me know that because of the holiday they couldn't get formal approval from my insurance company to switch medications from Taxotere to Taxol, so the plan was for me to assume that we'd get approval, but just in case, he wanted me to prepare to "re-challenge" the Taxotere drug. What that means is basically to try the drug I reacted to again, but with some new precautions. He wanted me to take the steroid med they'd prescribed, Benadryl and Zantac last night as well as this morning. So I was prepared today for both scenarios, but found out at about 10:00 am that they'd gotten "tentative" approval from the insurance company to go ahead with the Taxol so that became the plan. I did take all the pre-meds just in case so I was a bit sleepy after two Benadryl at 1:00 this afternoon. Anyway, because of the snow, it was a little touch and go with getting there, but my awesome neighbor Kathy drove me in her nice new four wheel drive truck and we had zero problem. </div></div> <div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUL-P1-0eSYrkobi4_7Fz5AAosgyAYHySWir7XtmJy6UGQAg8t6hoOmjiEdajZyXW1iBm7hFZfzNCWioudgrLAOF_IXW-qxLbN1YoW5yhpWxXJpPLsR8ccxlXH6bOOCb3w8S902dmi-oVo/s1600/P1170786.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" kba="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUL-P1-0eSYrkobi4_7Fz5AAosgyAYHySWir7XtmJy6UGQAg8t6hoOmjiEdajZyXW1iBm7hFZfzNCWioudgrLAOF_IXW-qxLbN1YoW5yhpWxXJpPLsR8ccxlXH6bOOCb3w8S902dmi-oVo/s200/P1170786.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><><> <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmj3UjGR6_eRWB0qG4qnXiU_SVSpv9ovN41GgpMk_FlQ2pcMl6AWA5FKITTdOZkWGH-X3LTbYqmAI6zWrtTTjDS1sHWgsWZxYz0rUHK0KCnpe1GtLfi5GyrE7wabTk1fC07wohqEHEIB7K/s1600/P1170787.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" kba="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmj3UjGR6_eRWB0qG4qnXiU_SVSpv9ovN41GgpMk_FlQ2pcMl6AWA5FKITTdOZkWGH-X3LTbYqmAI6zWrtTTjDS1sHWgsWZxYz0rUHK0KCnpe1GtLfi5GyrE7wabTk1fC07wohqEHEIB7K/s200/P1170787.JPG" width="150" /></a> </></div></></><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Comfy chairs!</td><><> <div></div></></></tr>
</tbody></table> <div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">So we got there about 1:15 and checked in. They took us back to the infusion room almost immediately and they decided to do a blood draw, which showed my neutraphil levels were still really high </div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"> (19,000) so no Neulasta shot-yay! </div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">I didn't have a huge entourage today, just Kathy, Howard, and Jeff. My friend Tracy (a member of the Real Breast Cancer Survivors of Snohomish County cast) was at the Cancer Partnership getting her very LAST dose of radiation (congratulations!) so she and her husband came for a visit. She brought me a wonderful gift bag with some major meaning. In it was a Wonder Woman Barbie. <em>Unfortunately</em>, I am the 10th recipient of her, and my job will<em> sadly</em> be to pass it on to another breast cancer patient. Every time I look at her I'll think of all the other women who've faced the same battle and made it through and will BELIEVE I will be among them. Thank you Tracy. I am so happy that you are through the tough stuff and I can't wait to plan our outfits for the three day!</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
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</div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUU0GBvwh_u_b8a1Tp0lAhcvs2KBWgtrKTiOtJiW__qXXY5-IlomiFJkN9KPJQ3zStaGariqTyD6_a0sVGkZ3m8YHl1tcGxnI9IkkF_bVKOIeSyx6npC6iclLY5G6R6SmA-dJIj1ARLxfV/s1600/P1170788.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" kba="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUU0GBvwh_u_b8a1Tp0lAhcvs2KBWgtrKTiOtJiW__qXXY5-IlomiFJkN9KPJQ3zStaGariqTyD6_a0sVGkZ3m8YHl1tcGxnI9IkkF_bVKOIeSyx6npC6iclLY5G6R6SmA-dJIj1ARLxfV/s200/P1170788.JPG" width="200" /></a></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">**A little side note, I am a total medical professional snob. If I happen to be a patient of yours someday, watch out because my expectations are H-I-G-H! I did NOT care for my nurse today. I'd say she's the first person I have not liked at the Cancer Partnership. I won't name names, but she won't be getting a thank you card from me. I asked to take her picture and she refused. Yep. Refused. What-EVER. Plus, I had to inform her that she was typing on the computer with gloves that had my blood spilled on them. She was a bit odd but thankfully I didn't have a crisis or anything and really didn't deal with her too much.**</div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">So the Taxol was no problem, which was a huge relief and the Cytoxin was a breeze just like before, so we were outta there in about three hours. Not too shabby. My next appointment is scheduled for February 7th, so I should be completely through with chemo by February 27th. My plan is to run (or walk) with my buddy Denise in the St. Patty's day run in Seattle. I can't think of a better way to celebrate. Well, I could but still, you know what I mean. </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Now do your job Honey Badgers!</div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div>Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-83524687986610121992012-01-14T11:06:00.001-05:002012-01-14T11:21:46.966-05:00That's Why They Get The Big Bucks<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="http://www.cancerpartnership.org/Site/Content/Images/physicians/jiang.gif" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://www.cancerpartnership.org/Site/Content/Images/physicians/jiang.gif" /></a><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I love my oncologist Dr. Jiang. Dr. Kent (my surgeon) is still number one on my list but Dr. Jiang is a clear second in terms of my overall doctor favs. Here's the skinny on my situation. </span></div><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;">As you may know, I had a severe reaction to my Taxotere infusion on Thursday which caused them to halt my treatment completely and have to look for a new chemo regimen. It was very devastating to me simply because I had a "plan" and now it was shot to hell. Going through a cancer battle is a constant series of ups and downs. Having a plan gives you a sense of control, which eases the anxiety and allows you to function somewhat normally. Whenever something goes awry, it forces you back to that place of not knowing again, and for me, I don't like it there. After Thursday's little fiasco it was back to the drawing board and a loss of what little control I felt I had. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">Just to back track a little. The reaction I had on Thursday was very unusual. My blood pressure shot up, my face turned bright red, and I had the feeling that I couldn't breathe. Everyone there jumped into action and got control of the situation and I was feeling better within about half an hour. The PA, Mark, came in and told me they couldn't continue with the treatment that day, and I would no longer be able to take the Taxotere drug. This was extremely upsetting because I immediately thought my only choice was to go to a combination of drugs called Adriamycin Cytoxin. Adriamycin was the chemo drug I was hoping to avoid, simply because of the potential for long term side effects and the harsher, more frequent regimen. Cytoxin I was already getting, so that was of no concern to me. Obviously I was going to do whatever I needed to do to kill this cancer, but it was a blow nonetheless. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">Well, I had my appointment with Dr. Jiang yesterday and it was such a relief! He is going to put me on a combination of drugs called Taxol and Cytoxin. Taxol is a "cousin" of the Taxotere, with one distinct difference. Apparently, Taxotere has some sort of binding agent in it which causes the type of severe reaction I had. Taxol does not have this binding agent in it, so there's no reason to believe I'll have another reaction. Yay! Taxol is typically not used for early stage breast cancer, but is approved in late stage metastatic breast cancers (we think because of cost), but since I can't tolerate the other, my insurance company should approve it. Let's hope so or they will be getting a few not so pleasant phone calls from one bitchy bald chick. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">I go in Tuesday for treatment number two and I do get credit for the infusion I already had. This will put me back on track to being halfway done. Phew! The side effects are pretty much the same between the two drugs, so there should be no surprises. I'll actually be better off since I won't be needing to take the pre-treatment steroids (which made me antsy). So, I can breathe a sigh of relief. Thanks so much for the support and kind words everyone. Whether you all know it or not, every little bit of support motivates me to stay positive and keep fighting. Thank you!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">Gooooooooo Honey Badgers! </span>Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-52532078145613617152012-01-12T21:51:00.027-05:002012-01-18T00:27:36.274-05:00The Good, the Bad, and the Completely Awful<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"> </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"> </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"> </div></div> <div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"> </div><div style="text-align: right;"></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"> </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"> <table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5_uivmSDJYm2MWRg_fy8xUowRsYIPrMim7ENpqwLsw_waQ84SNttsA4fB-GinhYfadP3xhC_iCOyY7kCHYcvQVEa_IB-QfPsGglC_2Eu-xVl6YCZDDAeDCn0KSknTIMEkbHam_Lsez90B/s1600/P1170679.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" kba="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5_uivmSDJYm2MWRg_fy8xUowRsYIPrMim7ENpqwLsw_waQ84SNttsA4fB-GinhYfadP3xhC_iCOyY7kCHYcvQVEa_IB-QfPsGglC_2Eu-xVl6YCZDDAeDCn0KSknTIMEkbHam_Lsez90B/s200/P1170679.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Karli and I</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZIHYHONq_jljqrM782eZ3NX_SFG5JZMYbQUqjFOqFjaav1sEUwYHTMHcvVc9Lk3Xt0ET4Lx8joOrAfFjAijb8_QCPaUEJ0VK2ITandI-yt0Iz-X4lkaLDmSZA_iQyp7nX2aU8hLD0GV-y/s1600/P1170690.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" kba="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZIHYHONq_jljqrM782eZ3NX_SFG5JZMYbQUqjFOqFjaav1sEUwYHTMHcvVc9Lk3Xt0ET4Lx8joOrAfFjAijb8_QCPaUEJ0VK2ITandI-yt0Iz-X4lkaLDmSZA_iQyp7nX2aU8hLD0GV-y/s200/P1170690.JPG" width="200" /></a>Today I was scheduled for my second of four chemo treatments. Things started off really well. My blood counts were still high, 18,000 and I was told I did not have to get the Neulasta shot (to boost white blood cell production), which caused me so much pain the last time. My entourage today consisted of my aunt Diane, my friend Karli, Jeff and his dad Howard. We got settled in to our infusion room and got things going. First the anti-nausea meds (woo hoo) and then they started with the infusion of Taxotere. </div></div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_tvyRGHsTpkDMvXA3JVcYFjTZYL2QYNBeY2ph1AfPVgTy2IKpLX_xnJuFVEtHUqh8s2cqb-C4aZRzj5cDXXBvNowkGlCpgIdi1z9ndOcU1PZ8KW04OZoPMWVZmkIQj6-5Dh6UlIjsgw2V/s1600/P1170685.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" kba="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_tvyRGHsTpkDMvXA3JVcYFjTZYL2QYNBeY2ph1AfPVgTy2IKpLX_xnJuFVEtHUqh8s2cqb-C4aZRzj5cDXXBvNowkGlCpgIdi1z9ndOcU1PZ8KW04OZoPMWVZmkIQj6-5Dh6UlIjsgw2V/s200/P1170685.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This was SUPPOSED to be the good stuff!</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Taxotere is the first of two chemo drugs in my regimen, the second is Cytoxin. During my last treatment, I had a minor reaction to the Taxotere (nausea), but I was hoping that was just a fluke and this time would be no problem. Ah, the best laid plans of mice and men, often go awry. Within a couple of minutes of starting the infusion, major reaction. As in "I can't breathe" major. Yep, room full of people, blood pressure up to 170 something over 111, oxygen tank, the whole nine yards. They immediately stopped the Taxotere and flushed my system out with just plain Saline. After a few minutes I started feeling better and my vitals came down. I thought maybe it was me and I had a panic attack, so we can just try it again right? Maybe a little slower this time? Nope. </div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBvEyv0b_ZY4myv09aK070CN08OfE0dFgMrLNuwKfbA8Uq_BTSXGrVl96uc6WrrIhVf5jqT7b21ag-xIutT6RutNP0XOsEuEwyKBSHoSaJEEV2OleelKczh5caEgo0jpGsjTgptuJjcLRz/s1600/P1170683.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" kba="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBvEyv0b_ZY4myv09aK070CN08OfE0dFgMrLNuwKfbA8Uq_BTSXGrVl96uc6WrrIhVf5jqT7b21ag-xIutT6RutNP0XOsEuEwyKBSHoSaJEEV2OleelKczh5caEgo0jpGsjTgptuJjcLRz/s200/P1170683.JPG" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Nurse Jodi. LOVED her!</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"> </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="text-align: left;"></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Here's where the completely awful comes in. They had to stop my chemo today and I have to have a new regimen figured out. It's probably going to be the combination I was hoping to avoid-Adriamycin-but I may have no choice in the matter. I am beyond disappointed. Not only does this push my schedule out for who knows how long, but my regimen may be more intense and harder to tolerate. Not the day I was hoping for. I guess my Honey Badgers didn't like the tools they were given to work with and I've got to spring for some major equipment. My nurse today, Jodi, was so great (as they all are) and left me with some words as inspiration. She said "Everything happens for a reason and maybe this was not the drug you were supposed to have to get you better". I hope she's right. I HAVE to believe she's right. But for today I'm frustrated and upset. I have an appointment with the Oncologist tomorrow and we'll move to plan "B". </div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">I would like to send a special thanks out to my friend Deanna Mang who sent me this beautiful "Prayer Shawl". That was so thoughtful of you, and boy do I need that today! I will wear it faithfully. Thank you so much for thinking of me.</div></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGOJ302QbGyMk2d6vlNc8u4TBHSlDh7bKpTA7QWqcnJTEWC0iTzcT41fXyAC1bsv0xRlcDe4VCNoN0PzHhRo3NtyM-LEUeo1_Xdbb2gTeuwXVk4QNq2U2RUPPyp1v-JlCkafi3U5aN5Q9e/s1600/P1170691.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" kba="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGOJ302QbGyMk2d6vlNc8u4TBHSlDh7bKpTA7QWqcnJTEWC0iTzcT41fXyAC1bsv0xRlcDe4VCNoN0PzHhRo3NtyM-LEUeo1_Xdbb2gTeuwXVk4QNq2U2RUPPyp1v-JlCkafi3U5aN5Q9e/s200/P1170691.JPG" width="200" /></a></div>Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-51970313550093504862012-01-11T19:57:00.000-05:002012-01-11T19:57:52.076-05:00Meet the Real Breast Cancer SURVIVORS of Snohomish CountyDon't judge me. I am a Real Housewives fanatic. I've seen virtually every episode of every season with the exception of DC and Miami, which were both a hot mess (IMHO). So, I think you should all be introduced to this year's cast of real and actual breast cancer fighters/survivors from Snohomish and surrounding cities (as they relate to moi). <br />
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<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><strong><u>Kimberly A.</u></strong> </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><img alt="" aria-busy="true" aria-describedby="fbPhotosSnowboxCaption" class="spotlight" height="149" src="http://a2.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/386083_2437334885989_1030238066_32777314_1329911534_n.jpg" width="200" /> I met Kimberly at Snohomish Boot Camp. We were both regulars at the 5:30 a.m. class and got to know each other through our struggles with diet and exercise. I was diagnosed on October 27th, and she was diagnosed on October 28th. Crazy. She's had a much rougher treatment regimen than me, but has the most amazing outlook and attitude and is nothing short of inspirational. She's been such an important touchstone and I'm so glad I know her! You can check out her blog here: <a href="http://www.kimberlyackley.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">Kimberly's Journey</a>.<br />
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<strong><u>Tracie E</u></strong>.<br />
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</div>Tracie is also a Snohomish Boot Camper. She had just started attending shortly before I was diagnosed, and another camper referred me to her after I found out about my cancer. It's amazing how this disease can create immediate friendships. Tracie was diagnosed in the fall of 2010 and has completed treatment and is doing A-MAZING! It's so great to see someone a year out from diagnosis and doing so well. She's walking proof it can be done and that hair does grow back!<br />
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<strong><u>Tracy L.</u></strong><br />
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<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="http://a3.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/316669_2380784888752_1524571129_2580468_2132423305_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" aria-busy="true" aria-describedby="fbPhotosSnowboxCaption" border="0" class="spotlight" height="133" src="http://a3.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/316669_2380784888752_1524571129_2580468_2132423305_n.jpg" style="cursor: move;" unselectable="on" width="200" /></a>I cannot even tell you how important Tracy has been to me through this journey. Tracy has twin daughters that play for the softball team my husband helps coach. I don't know that we had ever had a single conversation, but I had heard through the grapevine that she was diagnosed with breast cancer this summer and was in the midst of her treatments when I found out about mine. I was so desparate to talk to anyone about what I was going through, and what to expect, and I went out on a limb and asked a mutual friend for her phone number. She was so great! She told me everything. We talked about treatment options, surgical options, emotions, our husbands, kids, how it felt, how it looked, and how does life go on after. She gave me advice and listened while I broke down and cried. She kept telling me "You'll get through it. I know it doesn't feel like that now, but you will". She was right. The days of falling apart are fewer and farther between, and have been replaced with optimism and excitement for my future. </div><br />
<strong><u>Honorary cast member-Dawnelle J</u></strong>. <strong>(there's always one that doesn't fit the criteria)</strong><br />
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<img alt="" aria-busy="true" aria-describedby="fbPhotosSnowboxCaption" class="spotlight" height="153" src="http://a8.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/75709_172788806081973_100000525650950_544529_5940022_n.jpg" width="200" /> I feel the need to mention my dear friend Dawnelle here. She doesn't have breast cancer, but she has been my go to girl for research and motivation. She has sent me dozens of inspiring messages and has been there for me through this entire journey; making me laugh, bringing me things, and she took those beautiful family photos. Her mom recently went through uterine cancer treatment and has had some great advice from that experience. Who knew when I started working at that bank 20 years ago that we would be here today? Love you and thank you!<br />
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<strong><u>Libby H.</u></strong><br />
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<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="http://a6.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/269647_2051660924381_1030238066_32386194_7783236_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img alt="" aria-busy="true" aria-describedby="fbPhotosSnowboxCaption" border="0" class="spotlight" height="200" src="http://a6.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/269647_2051660924381_1030238066_32386194_7783236_n.jpg" width="164" /></a>Yeah, yeah, yeah, you don't need to know about me but I'll give you the specs. Diagnosed on October 27th, 2011 with Invasive Lobular Carcinoma at the age of 39. I had a lumpectomy and am currently receiving chemotherapy (number 2 of 4 is tomorrow-halfway baby!). I enjoy Pina Coladas and getting caught in the rain. I'm not into yoga,but I'm into Champagne. (wait that's a song, right?) Anyhoo, you get the idea.</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div>It has been such a gift to have access to all of these women throughout this "season". I hope that I have the opportunity to support someone going through this in the same way they've supported me. I know it would have been a much tougher journey without their inspiration and love. I love you all dearly! <br />
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</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><strong>***DISCLAIMER***</strong></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><strong>The Real Breast Cancer Fighters/Survivors of Snohomish County is a very EXCLUSIVE club. I know, it seems like a BLAST and you may be thinking you'd like to join our little group. I'm sorry, your request would be adamantly denied by all of us. We've got enough members and can only hope no one EVER qualifies to join our group, EVER. (But if you are forced, please feel free to reach out). </strong><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://a3.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/316669_2380784888752_1524571129_2580468_2132423305_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="64" src="http://a3.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/316669_2380784888752_1524571129_2580468_2132423305_n.jpg" style="filter: alpha(opacity=30); left: 41px; mozopacity: 0.3; opacity: 0.3; position: absolute; top: 660px; visibility: hidden;" width="96" /></a></div>Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-24457499384619866652012-01-07T16:51:00.002-05:002012-01-12T16:52:47.165-05:00Honey Badger Stole My HairDon't worry, it's all part of the "master plan". You see, on his mission to kill every single cancer cell in my body, Honey Badger has to kill every other fast growing cell. This means any and all hair (yes ALL), mucus membranes (hello bloody noses and dry mouth), and lots of other annoying (yet painless) little nuisances. <br />
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<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Here's how it went down. I basically knew somewhere around the two week mark, I could start losing my hair. I woke up every morning checking the pillow, tugging ever so gently to see if it would come out, and was sort of living on pins and needles about it. My biggest fear was to be walking through the grocery store and a random clump would just fall out and be hanging from the back of my coat. Can you imagine?! "Excuse me ma'am, you've got something on your jacket. Oh, it's a big chunk of hair". Yeah, that would be slightly embarrassing. Fast forward to Thursday night. Mandi and I were watching the season premier of Project Runway All Stars (go Mondo), when I reached up and low and behold, pulled out a handful of hair. Hmmm. Let's try this again. So, I did, and yep, another handful. JEFF!!!!! IT'S HAPPENING! Of course they were grossed out by the whole thing so I kept doing it, just to annoy them. Hee hee hee. Well, let's get the scissors and the clippers and have fun with it!</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Mandi did the honorary first major cut. Then she and I took turns. There were basically no rules so you can imagine what a lovely look I had going. Jeff stepped in with the clippers and tried various styles. Mullet, flat top, I even had a "tail" at one point. (None of those styles worked for me by the way) Finally, we shaved the whole thing. Weird. Every time I look in the mirror I expect the person staring back at me to start singing ( <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iUiTQvT0W_0" target="_blank">think Sinead O'Connor circa "Nothing Compares To You"</a>). It's quite strange, although I was surprisingly non-emotional over it. I thought for sure it would be devastating but it's been ok. I need to do some serious accessory shopping since I'm not super comfortable wearing the wig by itself. With a hat I think it looks like my normal hair, I just need to get to the wig shop and have the gal do a little tweaking, then I'll be good to go. </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6DSZul8vZhFLcs_stpEXmYIFx95fYhNVNJrdQAb6xljQuwMRcWYsv7uBz_6DqvRDhE80hGeUIV2ytnQj_tMrajzwN-yzisS3wpPXl1i0K93hk7O0TqI50OB2m95WYmFVR7CrEuGJp4pNN/s1600/Libby+and+Ryan+Pink+Duct+Tape.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" rea="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6DSZul8vZhFLcs_stpEXmYIFx95fYhNVNJrdQAb6xljQuwMRcWYsv7uBz_6DqvRDhE80hGeUIV2ytnQj_tMrajzwN-yzisS3wpPXl1i0K93hk7O0TqI50OB2m95WYmFVR7CrEuGJp4pNN/s200/Libby+and+Ryan+Pink+Duct+Tape.jpg" width="149" /></a> </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Yesterday I went to my friend Kyla's house and let her kids Ryan and Brianna use duct tape to get some of the stubble off. It was pretty funny. My entire head was covered in pink duct tape and Ryan was wearing my wig. Ha! Something they'll never forget I bet! We had fun with it. What else can you do, cry? Yeah...did that last night. I had about five minutes when it hit me that I looked weird, and then I got over it. Now it's all about being creative and getting comfortable. I'll get there. I've got the best support system in the world who remind me every day that they love me hair or no hair. Thank you my dear friends and family. </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjF_fsazxaFF4YrOEFNpnNEZnsy_EV7LMjXGdTr0G4qDfmt4yzTWbMSvXUKbKMmz4fdG6HY3js5WbhsG2_30p5GVljv5O3VQS4jKRzle4DKC12rcfsQvbmt7NLSl4JVGOe0BHXbIG551oMc/s1600/P1170580.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" rea="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjF_fsazxaFF4YrOEFNpnNEZnsy_EV7LMjXGdTr0G4qDfmt4yzTWbMSvXUKbKMmz4fdG6HY3js5WbhsG2_30p5GVljv5O3VQS4jKRzle4DKC12rcfsQvbmt7NLSl4JVGOe0BHXbIG551oMc/s200/P1170580.JPG" width="200" /></a> </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">To end on a good note...I have been feeling great! No nausea meds for days now and I feel completely normal (minus the hair). I'm so fortunate to be tolerating the chemo really well. Yay! My next treatment is Thursday, January 12th. I'll be ready. </div><br />
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</div>Go Honey Badgers!Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-144427316704479123.post-13928818113555794602011-12-31T23:09:00.000-05:002011-12-31T23:09:35.130-05:00My Two Cents About 2011Yes, 2011 is ending. Forgive me if I say it but thank you Jesus! This chick is ready to move on and greet 2012 with a renewed sense of purpose and attitude. According to my husband, daughter, and the History Channel, it'll all be for naught since apparently the world will be coming to an end on December 21, 2012 (per the Mayans). I'm going to go out on a limb and say that's probably not going to happen, so I'll just share my thoughts on 2011 and my hopes for 2012. <br />
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What a year! Started off great for me. I was on a mission to get healthy and the year ended with a mission to be in remission (get it?). Ha ha ha. Anyhoo, I realized this year (before my diagnosis) that I had wasted too much of my life being overweight and unhealthy. I missed having an active lifestyle, really living my life and enjoying the world. I spent many years going through the motions; working, being a mom, wife, volunteer, anything to take the focus off of myself and really doing what I needed to do. As many of you know, Snohomish Boot Camp changed everything for me. I not only had the resources to get in to good physical condition, but I met people that made me want to be a better person, friend, wife, and mother. I made friendships that have sustained me through some rough moments, and found a community of people that have accepted me at my worst and at my best. This may sound like an advertisement for a cult or something ridiculous, but these people have really been <strong><em>that</em></strong> important to me. What brings it all home is the fact that I found all of this <strong>BEFORE</strong> I got sick. What a gift! I started the fight for my life with the physical tools, the mental strength, and the support system already in place to give me a chance. I'm not trying to be melodramatic, but that is the reality. If you don't believe me, go to some cancer websites and read some stories. There are so many people out there fighting who have no hope. Not because their diagnosis are so extreme, but because they don't have the means to cope. I WILL NOT be that person. Does that mean I don't have moments of despair? Hell no! But it's inevitable that I draw from the strength I've acquired this past year and suck it up and move on. <br />
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Of course none (and I mean none) of the good things would have meant anything without the amazing love and support of my family. When I say I have the most amazing husband, Jeff, that would be a lie. No! Kidding! We have been married for 17 years and were high school sweethearts. When you get married young, like we did, you have no CLUE what life is really about-at least we didn't. You hope you pick the right person whom you believe will be a good husband and father, provider, and friend. But how do you ever really know? I can honestly say, I know. Jeff supported me through the years in every way, and when the going got tough and I got cancer, there was never a doubt that he would step up and be everything I've needed him to be. He makes me laugh when things are too serious, and he's been there in the middle of the grocery store when I've burst into tears over the thought this could be my last Christmas. He doesn't take on the world and try to "make it all go away", he simply hugs me and says "it's going to be okay". He tells me he's proud of me (and I believe him), and he reminds me of my goals (which can be annoying but necessary). I am so lucky. I love you Jeff. <br />
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Also, my beautiful baby girl, Mandi. The reason I wake up in the morning, the reason I go to work, the reason I come home, and the reason I drink and/or do recreational drugs occasionally. She has been my workout buddy and more supportive than any teenage girl should have to be this past year. At the end of the day, after all the nasty words and fights, she still wants to crawl into bed with her mama and that is reason enough to fight this fight. <br />
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I'm also so lucky to have tremendous support from my extended family, in-laws, neighbors, and co-workers. I hope I'm as good to you all as you've been to me;<br />
Mom, Di, Jas, Yvonne, Doug, Howard, Gigi, Kimberly, Paul, Bill, Kathy, Christine, my Healthline Peeps (all y'all), Kyla, Karli, etc. Thanks for putting up with my psychoness. Love you all!<br />
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So, on that happy note. I am REALLY looking forward to the New Year. I have more reasons than ever to enjoy every moment. I'm going to DO more things, spend more time with my family and friends, and don't be surprised if I give you a hug or throw in an "I love you" when you least expect it. Life is too slippery a slope to let those moments pass. Please learn from my experience and don't take things too seriously, or forget to enjoy each day. Have a happy and HEALTHY new year! Oh and girls, please do your self exams and schedule your mammos!<br />
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Libby<br />
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</div><div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><em><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><strong><span style="font-size: xx-small;">If you break your neck, if you have nothing to eat, if your house is on fire, then you got a problem. Everything else is inconvenience. ~Robert Fulghum</span></strong></span></em></div>Libby Hagenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00255277715211155540noreply@blogger.com3